i focus on the pain; the only thing that's real. | thaniel - Printable Version +- Beqanna (https://beqanna.com/forum) +-- Forum: Explore (https://beqanna.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?fid=1) +--- Forum: The Common Lands (https://beqanna.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?fid=72) +---- Forum: Forest (https://beqanna.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?fid=73) +---- Thread: i focus on the pain; the only thing that's real. | thaniel (/showthread.php?tid=6629) |
i focus on the pain; the only thing that's real. | thaniel - Offspring - 02-14-2016 everyone i know goes away in the end He rests his hip against an old, creaking pine, gently grinding his flesh against its bark as he croons softly in relief. An undeniable, insatiable itch had arisen as the result of the blistering heat of summer, and here he found solace, surrounded by the foliage that covered and sheltered him from the scalding temperature. The warm breeze wafts and weaves through the dense, thick forest, gently sweeping his forelock back. His thick lashes cover his crimson-stained eyes as he closes them, savoring the feel of the cool ventilation. A mass of his size is no match for the heat wave, built out of sinewy muscle and bone, carved thickly with undulating tendons and ligaments. The moisture remained thick in the air, though he tried hard to focus on the shadows cast onto his dark pelt and how comforting their embrace was. After a few long minutes of silence, he decided it was time to move. He could not linger in one spot for too long. He desired hydration, and knew of a creek that ran along the newer spring of pines in the midst of the forest, which sprouted up from the remains of a scorching fire from many years previous. He had lived such an incredibly long, drawn out life thus far - he could remember the towering conifers that once stood in their place, before they had burnt away to ash. He pushed forward, his thick body pressing and squeezing between various branches and limbs, sweat dripping down along his jaw as his forelock became matted and damp with sweat. At last, the trickle of water can be heard, and it is sweet music to his ears as he nears it. He lowers his broad neck, lips tasting and savoring the cool water as he drinks heavily, growing inebriated over the sweet iciness as it lines his throat and travels down along his overheated tissue. He was a traveler, craving contact with various terrains, but it was within moments such as these in the midst of a hot, smoldering summer that he was most grateful for the icy tundra that he called his own. He lifted his head, his dark crimson eyes peering into the dark shade of the forest. He looked forward to returning to its glacial embrace, even with the coolness that shadows cast by the looming trees gave. He was simply no match for the heat. offspring @[thaniel] RE: i focus on the pain; the only thing that's real. [thaniel] - thaniel - 02-21-2016 If a man can bridge the gap between life and death, if he can live on after he's dead, then maybe he was a great man. RE: i focus on the pain; the only thing that's real. [thaniel] - Offspring - 02-21-2016 everyone i know goes away in the end Having become lost in his own vacant thoughts (as he is so prone to doing), the shrill screech is enough to unnerve him, causing his heart to leap within his chest, pounding hard against the confines of his rib cage. He stares down incredulously at the source of the high-pitched shriek. His crimson eyes slowly take in the small mass of mottled gray standing awkwardly, equally as startled as he is - if not more. He tried to hide away a faint smile, amused by the boy's blatant misunderstanding of an overstated and overused misnomer. He managed to retain his stoic demeanor as he shifted his mass from one foreleg to the other, his dark eyes peering into the thicket cautiously, suddenly altogether aware that a young child was unlikely to be left alone for long in such a potentially insidious place. "Technically, I was here first." His voice rumbles out from his dried-out, scratchy throat, his tone containing an uptick of beguilement that had drawn so many to him in prior years. He did not often stop long enough to allow his charm to show, but he found it difficult to be stone-faced in front of the wide-eyed, overtly curious (and outright nosy) boy. His dark maroon eyes find his, peering deeply as he spoke again. "No, I can't say that I do. Nor that I have. It was not my intention to frighten you." He studies him for a long moment, taking in his dappled coat of smoky gray, his bright and wondering eyes, his tuft of tresses that were dampened by the heat of summer. He, himself, had forgotten for a moment about the blistering temperatures, distracted by the unruly, but altogether entertaining antics of the boy splayed out before him. He lowered his neck, bringing his muzzle closer to his as he breathes in his scent, seeking any sign of familiarity. The boy only smells of pine and of sweat, causing the skin above his brow bones to crease together with uncertainty. Though it causes a creak in his neck, he maintains his close composure, remaining eye to eye with him. "What is your name? Where is your mother?" He is not certain he wants to know the answer. offspring RE: i focus on the pain; the only thing that's real. [thaniel] - thaniel - 02-21-2016 If a man can bridge the gap between life and death, if he can live on after he's dead, then maybe he was a great man. RE: i focus on the pain; the only thing that's real. [thaniel] - Offspring - 02-21-2016 everyone i know goes away in the end
Again, he is forced to try to hide his amusement as the boy begins to take in (with awe) his stature and size - it was not an unusual response; he was massive in comparison to most of the valley and had a certain presence that made many wary of him, of his intentions. Youth, however, was on the dappled boy's side, and for this he is simply curious, eager to sate his need for knowledge and understanding. It had been a long time since he had been within the presence of young, and it brought many painful memories to the surface, though he struggled to remain in the moment. "I doubt you'll stay small, but I equally doubt you'll grow as large as I am." He takes a moment to nudge one of the boy's sinewy but spindly legs, his lips curving with a wry smirk. "You're of a slim build. But you will grow." Thaniel. It was a simplistic name, but beautiful in its own way. It spoke of a love, of adoration - it was a carefully thought out name, that much was certain. He had been loved in his birth that he was given a name he could carry without shame, unlike him, for Offspring was certainly not a name born out of anything but disdain, dismay and mayhaps hatred. He couldn't say for certain. His mother had been a callous woman, with little regard for him - she had preferred he be a stillborn, for the union that had caused his existence was one of violence and rape - things Thaniel did not yet know. The product of lust and power, he had been given a name that only suited what he was. Never who he was. He loathed it, but had long since grown used to it. His faint smile faded as the word dead rolled so simply off of the boy's tongue. A pang of pity struck him in the breastplate. If his name had been chosen so carefully, so lovingly, only to leave the boy alone and on his own, he pondered for a moment which situation was worse. Having a mother that did not love nor care made it easier to let go, to drown it out, to forget - but to lose a mother that loved so deeply as to have so carefully named her child, so young - it filled his chest to the brim with dread. He would not ask. He was not certain as to how it may upset the boy, which was the last thing he wanted to do. Instead, he would respond in kind. "My name is Offspring," he is certain the boy will have something to say about that. "and my mother is dead too. I am very old, you see." He hopes this will distract him from the obvious, but he has a feeling that it won't. "I have lived one hundred and eighteen years. Not many live to be as old as I am." offspring RE: i focus on the pain; the only thing that's real. [thaniel] - thaniel - 03-09-2016 If a man can bridge the gap between life and death, if he can live on after he's dead, then maybe he was a great man. RE: i focus on the pain; the only thing that's real. [thaniel] - Offspring - 03-09-2016 lend me your hand and we'll conquer them all. but lend me your heart and i'll just let you fall.
"You won't be short forever," He chuckled softly, the sound rumbling deep within his chest as he shifts his massive weight from one set of legs to the next, growing weary of standing in one spot for too long. "Look at your legs. Look at how long they are. That tells me you'll be tall when you're older; you're already growing taller each day. There were such deep, fundamental differences between the two; it was almost a comical mismatch. He had spent much of his time hiding away from the world, and for many reasons - he had lived long enough to experience much of what Thaniel has yet to, and life is harsh, and it is cruel, and within the realm of immortality, it can be an overwhelming reality. In his youth, he had struggled with this suffering, and it is not until recent years that he had come to draw himself out of his own shell. Perpetual loneliness is no way to live a life, and eventually, the quiet evenings and solitary days grow tiring. He craved companionship and experiences once more, but it had taken years of strike and self-loathing to arrive at that conclusion. Life was far from simple, and while many were working against a timed clock, he himself had heard the ticking of his own die long ago. He had all of the time in the world, which was both a terrifying and beautiful thing. When he had been young - not as young as Thaniel, no, but young enough to be naive - he had thought the same things. He would have never turned away in difficult times, nor would he have hidden - but he also supposed that when one being is exposed to so much anguish in one small square space of time, sometimes it is best to disappear, lick the wounds clean and reassess. He loses himself for a brief moment in these thoughts as he leans down, letting the cool water of the spring to touch his lips as he drinks. Once he is finally sated, he lifts his thick neck again with an abrupt toss, willing his unruly, tangled tresses to remain at bay. His dark red eyes peer once more at the boy, who is more than he bargained for in this small venture from the icy confines of his home. When Thaniel begins to speak of his name, he cannot help but to inwardly roll his eyes. He loathes this story, and though the dappled boy's question is innocent enough, it causes a roll of anxiety to dwell within the pit of his stomach. He studies him as he finds amusement in his name, but he can see the lack of understanding and he softens as a faint smile tugs at the corners of his own. He cannot expect a child to understand, but he would will him to. "Honestly, kid? My mother didn't want me, so she tried to give me the most genetic name possible. A name that isn't actually a name. Unfortunately for her, I did not understand that at the time and grew fond it anyway. And I kept it." He saw no use in lying to him - he was very young still, but he was obviously bright, and incredibly forthcoming. He knew it was only a matter of time until he pressed him hard enough for the information anyway. He pauses to study the boy, his own muscles flexing beneath his taut, obsidian pelt as he observes him. The bleak sunlight of day peeks through the thick foliage of the forest and lingers on his spine, warming him to the core in a way that evoked a longing for the icy tundra. His crimson gaze bores into him, watching the way his face contorts into one of familiar sadness. He can sense the change in the atmosphere and he can almost feel the way the boy's heart constricts. He knows the feeling all too well. Loneliness was an insatiable beast, hungry for any source of woe or distress. The boy attempts to then force his way into laughter once more, but he can see through his thinly veiled disguise all to well and his eyes remain soft now, his smile far gone. He tried to find amusement in Offspring's age, but he himself could sense the ebb and flow of their conversation beginning to shift. He had pondered before whether or not the boy would leave him alone soon, and soon it was clear to him that the boy needed guidance, needed company. Though he was evidently very independent and undeniably full of life and energy, he was craving companionship. The thought weighed heavily in his mind, and he forced a smile to retain some sort of semblance of normalcy as the gears in his mind grind in thought. "I was this large before I hit the age of seven, so no, that isn't why - but you are right. I probably do look old." He does not tell him that he will never look older than he does now. That he will never know the ache of pained joints or fragile bones. He will never see an end to this life; though he will see the lives of many more that he comes across in his journeys turn to dust within years' times. He is too young to understand the implications of it, and he does not want to go into it now. "Nightfall is coming and I have to leave now. I live miles away, in the icy tundra," He pauses, watching the colt's expression carefully. "It is cold, and sometimes difficult to live in, but it is my home. You shouldn't be out here alone." and against his better judgment, "Come with me." OFFSPRING
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