Her uncertainty gives way to confusion when he mentions her parents, but she nods of course. She does not let herself think about them if she can help it, but she remembers telling Tarian that brief piece of her history. When they had shared a night in Loess and she had first realized she could fall for him. Altissima knows why she had run from this feeling, but she feels distant from that desire to flee now, tucked beneath his wing as she keeps their glows dim and unobtrusive while he speaks.
She relaxes as his story begins, the story of a young Tarian - and she finds herself smiling as his voice warms, glad that he had such a good start to his life. Unsurprised that it is so different than the way she had started her own. But that grin fades when his tone darkens and she presses herself closer into his side just as his wing tightens around her. She considers touching him, but does not move except for that small shift of her weight.
Altissima feels grief for his family, for the weight that this history has placed on him. She does not look away when he seeks out her face, her eyes a pale blue with her sadness for him. She doesn’t immediately understand why he is telling her this - and his quiet confession that it is not fear over his own death, but if something were to happen to her startles her.
Frightens her and enchants her all at once.
Is she ready to die with him?
Altissima doesn’t know and doesn’t know if it is a flaw of hers that she is unsure. Would a better mare be sure of that right away? Would a princess or empress be ready to lay down their life for him so easily?
She does not know if she would die for him, but she does know she would not run. So maybe that is her answer.
Altissima doesn’t know what the magic words are to ease his fears so she just says what she wants him to know.“I’ve spent my whole life avoiding attachments. Right from the day I was born. I have a daughter but her father… he could not be farther from being in the picture. I have never wanted to spend time with anyone.” And now she smiles, her eyes shifting to a darker shade. “Until you, Tarian.”
This is the first time she’s believed that being known is worth the risk. And maybe it will tear her apart to have him torn from her or maybe she can help stop it from happening at all. Altissima doesn't have the experience to know if what she says next will help or hurt, but she wants to say it to him. She believes it to be true.
“So if that day ever comes, we'll figure it out. We’ll face it” And then, possibly the scariest word she’s ever spoken is breathed into his ear: “together.” A fierce, determined note weaves itself into her voice as she shifts, moving her muzzle against his skin - mirroring his earlier actions on her own flesh as she tells him “Because I'm not going to let anyone take you from me, or me from you.”
Her heart is hammering so loudly as she says this she can barely hear her own words, fear creeping back in and she continues her exploration of his neck so she will not have to look at his face.
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