09-06-2016, 05:38 PM
<center> <link href="https://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Bilbo+Swash+Caps" rel="stylesheet"><style> #lilithatexture {background-image:url('https://s26.postimg.io/tgxdfw309/lithatexture.jpg'); width: 500px; border: 1px solid black; box-shadow: 0px 0px 30px black; -webkit-transition: all 1s ease-in-out;-moz-transition: all 1s ease-in-out;-ms-transition: all 1s ease-in-out;-o-transition: all 1s ease-in-out;transition: all 1s ease-in-out;} #lilithatexture:hover {box-shadow: 0px 0px 40px #831516;} #lilithapic {background-image: url('https://s32.postimg.org/49dd61m39/lilithaforsam.png'); width: 500px; height: 707px;} #lilithapost {background-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.9); width: 440px; padding: 20px; color: white; text-align: justify; font-size: 9pt; line-height: 12pt;} #lilithaquote {margin-top: -150px; background-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.9); width: 440px; padding: 20px; padding-bottom:0px;padding-top:30px; color: white; text-align: center; font-size: 18pt;font-family: 'Bilbo Swash Caps', cursive; line-height: 18pt; border-radius: 100% 100% 0% 0%; -webkit-transition: all 1s ease-in-out;-moz-transition: all 1s ease-in-out;-ms-transition: all 1s ease-in-out;-o-transition: all 1s ease-in-out;transition: all 1s ease-in-out; text-shadow: 0px 0px 5px #831516;} #lilithaquote:hover {text-shadow: 0px 0px 15px #831516;} #lilithaname {padding-top:20px;padding-bottom:5px;text-align:center;font-family: 'Bilbo Swash Caps', cursive;font-size:48px;color:#ffffff;}</style> <div id="lilithatexture"><div id="lilithapic"></div> <div id="lilithaquote">I pretend to close my eyes;<br>I pretend I'm burning bright.</div><div id="lilithapost">((Ummm, sorry in advance, guys. D: I tried to make this more cooperative. Lilitha wouldn’t have it.))
Oh, I try to keep my mouth shut. I do. We’re standing before the greatest powers in the land, it’s not smart to get upset. But when she tells us we should be begging, instead of just asking, well...newly rekindled sparks fall from my skin, fading into ash before they hit the ground. Still, I don’t say anything. This is more grown-up business, really, and I’m just here to follow my daddy, hopefully to our new home.
But see, then instead of being offended too, he just <i>obeys.</i> He takes her command in stride, and pours himself out at her feet, begging for forgiveness, enumerating his sins. <i>Our</i> sins. Saying we were all so very sorry for our pasts, that we are unworthy, that we’ve done wrong and we deserve the bad things that have happened.
Well that’s just dumb.
I’m not sorry. I’m not sorry for anything. And being treated like we’re all naughty little children who deserve to be punished, well that has my fire up. Even a little literally, as it flickers along my skin. I know I should stay quiet. I know I should let the adults dance like little puppets dangling from strings, saying the words Beqanna wants to hear in the hopes of receiving some scrap of affection, of approval.
As it happens, I’ve never been good at keeping my mouth shut. I dragged myself up this huge mountain, after just making my way down it not very long ago at all. My fire friend burned away my wings, and I didn't even scream, even though it hurt worse than anything I've ever felt in my whole life. And I came here thinking that the world was still my friend, even after everything that had happened. So when my hopeful little murmured almost-request is crushed beneath her hooves, I don't do the smart thing and play along.
I get mad.
“You want us to beg?” I ask, quiet rage seething in my voice as I step out of my daddy’s shadow and make myself a bright, shining target. “We came here looking for a home. For somewhere we can grow up in peace and safety. There aren’t exactly a lot of safe places left now that all of our homes are gone. Now that all of our lives have been torn apart, and in some cases far more than our lives. We were lucky. We found our family really fast. There are still a lot of people frantically searching for the people they love. You already took so much, and now you want us to <i>beg?</i>”
I snort, and a shower of sparks falls to the ground, dying before a fire can start. “I’m here to ask you: will you grant us shelter, and give us a home to live in? But I won’t beg. And I won’t let anyone else apologize for me.” I glance over at my daddy, and he’s the only one I apologize to, with just my eyes, for maybe jeopardizing his request.
“We aren’t bad. I’m not. My siblings aren’t. My daddy sure isn’t; look at how many kids he’s taken into his heart and his former home. My mama isn’t, or he wouldn’t love her the way he does. I don’t think I’ve ever even hurt anybody at all, so I won’t apologize or say I’m bad or wrong or unworthy, which is just a really mean thing to try to make someone feel. And I won’t let anybody make me feel bad about myself for no reason.” My ears pin back against my neck, and sparks cling to the red of my mane.
And that’s all I have to say. Even if it costs me my place with my family, I won’t let somebody treat them like dirt, or treat me like dirt. Not even the world herself. I want to be with them and be safe somewhere that is ours, but not at the cost of being dishonest, and pretending to feel bad about things that I didn’t even do wrong. The world can do what she likes with that. I only dance because I want to, not because somebody scary pulls my strings.<div id="lilithaname">Lilitha</div></div></div></center>
Oh, I try to keep my mouth shut. I do. We’re standing before the greatest powers in the land, it’s not smart to get upset. But when she tells us we should be begging, instead of just asking, well...newly rekindled sparks fall from my skin, fading into ash before they hit the ground. Still, I don’t say anything. This is more grown-up business, really, and I’m just here to follow my daddy, hopefully to our new home.
But see, then instead of being offended too, he just <i>obeys.</i> He takes her command in stride, and pours himself out at her feet, begging for forgiveness, enumerating his sins. <i>Our</i> sins. Saying we were all so very sorry for our pasts, that we are unworthy, that we’ve done wrong and we deserve the bad things that have happened.
Well that’s just dumb.
I’m not sorry. I’m not sorry for anything. And being treated like we’re all naughty little children who deserve to be punished, well that has my fire up. Even a little literally, as it flickers along my skin. I know I should stay quiet. I know I should let the adults dance like little puppets dangling from strings, saying the words Beqanna wants to hear in the hopes of receiving some scrap of affection, of approval.
As it happens, I’ve never been good at keeping my mouth shut. I dragged myself up this huge mountain, after just making my way down it not very long ago at all. My fire friend burned away my wings, and I didn't even scream, even though it hurt worse than anything I've ever felt in my whole life. And I came here thinking that the world was still my friend, even after everything that had happened. So when my hopeful little murmured almost-request is crushed beneath her hooves, I don't do the smart thing and play along.
I get mad.
“You want us to beg?” I ask, quiet rage seething in my voice as I step out of my daddy’s shadow and make myself a bright, shining target. “We came here looking for a home. For somewhere we can grow up in peace and safety. There aren’t exactly a lot of safe places left now that all of our homes are gone. Now that all of our lives have been torn apart, and in some cases far more than our lives. We were lucky. We found our family really fast. There are still a lot of people frantically searching for the people they love. You already took so much, and now you want us to <i>beg?</i>”
I snort, and a shower of sparks falls to the ground, dying before a fire can start. “I’m here to ask you: will you grant us shelter, and give us a home to live in? But I won’t beg. And I won’t let anyone else apologize for me.” I glance over at my daddy, and he’s the only one I apologize to, with just my eyes, for maybe jeopardizing his request.
“We aren’t bad. I’m not. My siblings aren’t. My daddy sure isn’t; look at how many kids he’s taken into his heart and his former home. My mama isn’t, or he wouldn’t love her the way he does. I don’t think I’ve ever even hurt anybody at all, so I won’t apologize or say I’m bad or wrong or unworthy, which is just a really mean thing to try to make someone feel. And I won’t let anybody make me feel bad about myself for no reason.” My ears pin back against my neck, and sparks cling to the red of my mane.
And that’s all I have to say. Even if it costs me my place with my family, I won’t let somebody treat them like dirt, or treat me like dirt. Not even the world herself. I want to be with them and be safe somewhere that is ours, but not at the cost of being dishonest, and pretending to feel bad about things that I didn’t even do wrong. The world can do what she likes with that. I only dance because I want to, not because somebody scary pulls my strings.<div id="lilithaname">Lilitha</div></div></div></center>