02-01-2018, 08:21 PM
She awoke, cold and confused, the edge of the dream slipping away faster than she could catch it. It had been a good dream, she thought. Or maybe a sad one. Shaking out her fiery mane, an ache of loss held her close. It was still dark, in the little grove she had claimed as her own, and her young son twitched in a deep dream at her feet. Staring at his slight form for a moment, she tried desperately once more to feel something, anything, for the child. The frown that creased her forehead so frequently these days remained in place. He was a beautiful child, to be sure, dark and pale at once. His fledged wings curled close to his sides, just as she'd hoped. He was beautiful, and perfect (save for that one dead eye), and she felt nothing for him. Maybe that's why she had yet to bring herself to naming him. He still didn't feel like hers to name. This was not to say the boy was neglected. No, she had no problems caring for him. But the attention she paid him was no different than that she would pay to any child under the care of her kingdom. More out of a sense of duty than love, she brushed her lips against his tiny brow. She wanted to cry, and she frequently did these days, when she knew she was alone. Gazing across the still grove, observing the sleeping bodies of those who chose to stay here, a sense of chaos filled her heart. Cool, calm, collected. Air rushed in and out of flared nostrils, demanding serenity. Sleep had abandoned her, and anxiety begged her to stretch her limbs. After one final glance around her domain, reassuring herself of their safety, the heart-sore queen stole away.
The dark cloaked her somewhat, although the new shimmer bestowed on her coat was evident even in the faint light of a barely-there crescent moon. It felt good to be moving. It would feel be better to be airborn. Trance-like, she cast out with her mighty wings, breaking into a sudden gallop as they pumped once, twice, thrice... and left the world behind. She felt heavy, even without the weight of her son bearing her to earth. Beating her wings harder, she fought the sluggishness, soaring a mile above the ground. Beqanna faded into a grey and black map, surrounded by inky waters. Bathed in starlight, she found a missing peace. For an hour or more she glided in the thin air. It was bitterly cold, and the wind cut at her face unforgivingly. It was lovely. Mind wandering, it did not clearly tell her when the shadow started following her. Out of the corner of her eye, it flew near, a darker black against the spangled skies. A terse dance began, her against the faceless flier. She felt no fear. Only a kind of annoyance, that her midnight excursion was being interrupted. Gradually, she noticed that the feinting passes the stranger persisted in making had a purpose. She was being driven slowly but surely downward. She made a split second decision, refusing to play this game any longer. The sails of her wings snapped shut, her body making a graceful arc as she fell from the sky head first. Wind dragged tears from her eyes, screaming in her ears. It would be easy, too easy, to not save herself. To simply keep her wings to her flanks, and find a quick end against the rapidly rising earth. The shadowed figure kept pace as she fell, she thought, still lingering just on the edge of her vision. At the very last moment, her wings unfurled. It hurt, the air filling them, jerking her back violently. Without meaning to, her legs collapsed as they impacted the grassy surface. Soundlessly, the shadow alighted beside her. She rose to her feet again, legs shaking, taking in the one she knew had brought her here. Winged like her, it was a pitch-dark woman who now stood facing her. She was beautiful, eyes full of compassion as she took in the winded mare. Sabra took her in, noticing that her shadow was not just black. An aura hung about her, a golden shine, flecks of rosy light adorning her skin. She wanted to be afraid, but couldn't bring herself to be. The was no malice here, no aggression. Just patient silence.
"What... what do you want?" The gemstone woman asked, her voice low and quiet. A small smile softened the dark mare's face, kindness in her expression. "I was about to ask you the same question, Sabra. I am here to grant you a wish of sorts. There is a regret in your heart, one I think I can help you with." A hundred questions rose to the front of her mind, replaced by a single face. The heart of her sorrows. The reason she had come here, and made so many bad decisions since. It was always her wish, to see him again. Every day, every hour, though she would have denied it to anyone. Anyone except this beautiful being before her. "I miss him. It's my fault he's dead, and I miss him. I wish I could tell him that." She admitted, voice harsh with unshed tears. The dark mare was silent a moment more, before nodding her head slowly. "Yes, I can see that you do. I can grant you time with him. Just until the sun breaks over the sea, and then all will be as before. Remember that." With a solemn face, the lady stepped back, and a great wind rose up from the stillness. Dust flew in Sabra's face, making her flinch and look away. The wind died as suddenly as it had risen, leaving soft stillness. Sneezing grit from her nose, she lifted her head once more. Her heart stuttered as she realized they had been joined by another.
"Arik." A disbelieving whisper, and yet there he stood. It was impossible, wonderful. Awful. He was just as she remembered, from his unruly tawny mane, to the lanky grace of his build, right down to the teasing, mocking smile that she knew was solely meant for her. "Oh, Arik! It's really you, isn't it?" She rushed to his side, peppering his face and neck with kisses. She inhaled deeply, drawing in that warm, familiar scent. Like cinnamon and clean sweat, it was entirely him. There was a growing damp place on his shoulder where her tears had soaked in, yet his neck curved over hers still, holding the weeping mare close. They stayed that way for some time and she could feel his own chest rise and fall with silent sobs. Silent. Arik as she'd known him was not naturally silent. She stepped back a moment, realizing this other caveat even before asking it aloud. "You can't talk, can you?" She asked, and his sad little head shake confirmed her wordlessly. She felt like a young girl again, remembering sharply that hellish day two years ago. Her father's face, usually so doting when looking upon his daughter, stormy with a ferocious anger. Arik, prone on the ground, shining eyes gone dim as his life's blood soaked the dust beneath him. She had wept and begged and pleaded with her father, desperate to save him. But it was ineffective. Anything in the world, the old king would have freely given his daughter. Anything except mercy, when he discovered his most trusted guard had "defiled" her. How else could he react, when she had been sworn to an ally of his since she was born? He would not be weak before his enemies. And so he'd had the youth slain, and made Sabra watch. A lesson, he'd said with a hard voice. She knew he was dead, because she had killed him. Dragging herself back to the present, she returned to her lost love's side. It was unbearable, to not touch him while she could. He leaned back into the contact, echoing her need. After a few stuttering breathes, she spoke again. "I'll have to do the speaking then." She commented to herself. All at once, she was afraid. Really afraid, like she hadn't been since leaving her father's land. What could she possibly say, to make this better?
Forming her words carefully, she began. "Arik. I... It's been two years, did you know that?" She asked, reassured as he nodded mutely. "Two years. I left, after... after... I left. Like we were planning to anyway, together. I wish, so much, that we had made it together. You'd love it here. Not so many rules. I'm a queen now. And I... I have a son." Everything was coming out of order, she didn't know what to tell him first. So much had happened. That last bit was struggle though, making her pause to see how he reacted to the news. Her heart broke just a little bit more as he smiled, an ache in his own expression. "I wish he were yours." She whispered, a fresh tear shining as it slipped down her cheek. Arik, sweet Arik, closed the distance between them, kissing the salty moisture from her skin. Letting her know as best as he could that he wasn't angry. Another brief silence fell over her as she gathered her thoughts. With a sigh, she continued. "I've been such an awful bitch since you... since you... died. I just keep fucking up." He scowled at her, looking like he couldn't for the world imagine her acting as she described. She had been sweet then, kind and caring. Some of that was coming back, as she interacting with her kingdom. But that core of regret kept a hardness in her. A sort of rot. Her damp blue eyes fluttered shut as she felt him stroke the length of her neck soothingly. He'd done the same years ago, when she had been upset over far lesser things.
"Arik. If I come to find you, would you be there?" She spoke in careful rhythm, as if the thought had just occurred to her. In fact, it was something she contemplated regularly. Those games of crashing towards earth, taunting rulers, tempting Death. If it meant she could be with him again... But no. The look he was giving her now was one of a desperate need to be understood. She was not to follow him into the dark. Not before her time. He glanced to her still-thickened torso, the teats hanging flush with milk. His meaning was clear. Her son, little No-Name back home. He needed her yet. And now she was responsible for a whole kingdom of people. She couldn't leave just yet. She laughed then, surprised that she could. "Arik, what am I supposed to do without you? You've always been the clever one. The brave one. We'd be together if I hadn't held us back." His nose bumped hers, a fierce look in his golden eyes. She wanted to believe it was anger in them, but she knew better. He'd never been able to hold a grudge in life, why should death change that? He forgave her. Or he'd never blamed her to begin with. It was in his face, and his actions. He loved her still.
"Time's almost up." The dark mare was back from where she'd wandered, had given them privacy. Sure enough, the horizon was tinged with the lightest thread of green. The sun was making his way back, surely as ever. Air caught in her throat, as Sabra spun to face her. "Please, please, I'm begging you. Just a little more time. I'll do anything." Her eyes were a bit wild, betraying the raw emotions the evening had drawn forth. The strange lady only shook her head, a touch of pity on her face. "I told you what this meeting would entail, Sabra. You can't go changing the rules now. It's time to say goodbye." Goodbye. Somehow, she'd never been able to bring herself to that point. The willingness to let go of the past, of him. Her head dropped tiredly. It was time, and she couldn't ignore it anymore. She turned back to the waiting chestnut man. "Thank you for spending this time with me. I wish I could have done better by you. You deserved so much more than what you got. Someone who could have given you a home and a family, a long and happy life. As long as I live, I'll wish things had gone differently." The horizon glowed now, a point brighter than the rest betraying where the sun would soon reveal it's face. In a rush, she finished her hard goodbye. "I will never forget this night, as long as I live. And I will live, because you'd be cross if I came to you early, I just know it." She laughed helplessly as the sun sent it's first rays across the sea. "I will tell my son your story. I love you Arik. Goodbye." She pressed her lips against the warmth of his as daylight flooded the bank they stood on.
That unnatural wind drove up again, spinning dust and leaves around until she couldn't see or hear. Like a ghost, it vanished once more. It left a lone mare in it's wake. Of the other two who had been her company that night there was no sign. Only her and the knowledge that just maybe, she could live her life well, without guilt. She went home with dawn showing her the way, and kissed her son's head as he slowly woke, not knowing she'd been gone at all. In her lightened heart, she felt the stirrings of new love.
The dark cloaked her somewhat, although the new shimmer bestowed on her coat was evident even in the faint light of a barely-there crescent moon. It felt good to be moving. It would feel be better to be airborn. Trance-like, she cast out with her mighty wings, breaking into a sudden gallop as they pumped once, twice, thrice... and left the world behind. She felt heavy, even without the weight of her son bearing her to earth. Beating her wings harder, she fought the sluggishness, soaring a mile above the ground. Beqanna faded into a grey and black map, surrounded by inky waters. Bathed in starlight, she found a missing peace. For an hour or more she glided in the thin air. It was bitterly cold, and the wind cut at her face unforgivingly. It was lovely. Mind wandering, it did not clearly tell her when the shadow started following her. Out of the corner of her eye, it flew near, a darker black against the spangled skies. A terse dance began, her against the faceless flier. She felt no fear. Only a kind of annoyance, that her midnight excursion was being interrupted. Gradually, she noticed that the feinting passes the stranger persisted in making had a purpose. She was being driven slowly but surely downward. She made a split second decision, refusing to play this game any longer. The sails of her wings snapped shut, her body making a graceful arc as she fell from the sky head first. Wind dragged tears from her eyes, screaming in her ears. It would be easy, too easy, to not save herself. To simply keep her wings to her flanks, and find a quick end against the rapidly rising earth. The shadowed figure kept pace as she fell, she thought, still lingering just on the edge of her vision. At the very last moment, her wings unfurled. It hurt, the air filling them, jerking her back violently. Without meaning to, her legs collapsed as they impacted the grassy surface. Soundlessly, the shadow alighted beside her. She rose to her feet again, legs shaking, taking in the one she knew had brought her here. Winged like her, it was a pitch-dark woman who now stood facing her. She was beautiful, eyes full of compassion as she took in the winded mare. Sabra took her in, noticing that her shadow was not just black. An aura hung about her, a golden shine, flecks of rosy light adorning her skin. She wanted to be afraid, but couldn't bring herself to be. The was no malice here, no aggression. Just patient silence.
"What... what do you want?" The gemstone woman asked, her voice low and quiet. A small smile softened the dark mare's face, kindness in her expression. "I was about to ask you the same question, Sabra. I am here to grant you a wish of sorts. There is a regret in your heart, one I think I can help you with." A hundred questions rose to the front of her mind, replaced by a single face. The heart of her sorrows. The reason she had come here, and made so many bad decisions since. It was always her wish, to see him again. Every day, every hour, though she would have denied it to anyone. Anyone except this beautiful being before her. "I miss him. It's my fault he's dead, and I miss him. I wish I could tell him that." She admitted, voice harsh with unshed tears. The dark mare was silent a moment more, before nodding her head slowly. "Yes, I can see that you do. I can grant you time with him. Just until the sun breaks over the sea, and then all will be as before. Remember that." With a solemn face, the lady stepped back, and a great wind rose up from the stillness. Dust flew in Sabra's face, making her flinch and look away. The wind died as suddenly as it had risen, leaving soft stillness. Sneezing grit from her nose, she lifted her head once more. Her heart stuttered as she realized they had been joined by another.
"Arik." A disbelieving whisper, and yet there he stood. It was impossible, wonderful. Awful. He was just as she remembered, from his unruly tawny mane, to the lanky grace of his build, right down to the teasing, mocking smile that she knew was solely meant for her. "Oh, Arik! It's really you, isn't it?" She rushed to his side, peppering his face and neck with kisses. She inhaled deeply, drawing in that warm, familiar scent. Like cinnamon and clean sweat, it was entirely him. There was a growing damp place on his shoulder where her tears had soaked in, yet his neck curved over hers still, holding the weeping mare close. They stayed that way for some time and she could feel his own chest rise and fall with silent sobs. Silent. Arik as she'd known him was not naturally silent. She stepped back a moment, realizing this other caveat even before asking it aloud. "You can't talk, can you?" She asked, and his sad little head shake confirmed her wordlessly. She felt like a young girl again, remembering sharply that hellish day two years ago. Her father's face, usually so doting when looking upon his daughter, stormy with a ferocious anger. Arik, prone on the ground, shining eyes gone dim as his life's blood soaked the dust beneath him. She had wept and begged and pleaded with her father, desperate to save him. But it was ineffective. Anything in the world, the old king would have freely given his daughter. Anything except mercy, when he discovered his most trusted guard had "defiled" her. How else could he react, when she had been sworn to an ally of his since she was born? He would not be weak before his enemies. And so he'd had the youth slain, and made Sabra watch. A lesson, he'd said with a hard voice. She knew he was dead, because she had killed him. Dragging herself back to the present, she returned to her lost love's side. It was unbearable, to not touch him while she could. He leaned back into the contact, echoing her need. After a few stuttering breathes, she spoke again. "I'll have to do the speaking then." She commented to herself. All at once, she was afraid. Really afraid, like she hadn't been since leaving her father's land. What could she possibly say, to make this better?
Forming her words carefully, she began. "Arik. I... It's been two years, did you know that?" She asked, reassured as he nodded mutely. "Two years. I left, after... after... I left. Like we were planning to anyway, together. I wish, so much, that we had made it together. You'd love it here. Not so many rules. I'm a queen now. And I... I have a son." Everything was coming out of order, she didn't know what to tell him first. So much had happened. That last bit was struggle though, making her pause to see how he reacted to the news. Her heart broke just a little bit more as he smiled, an ache in his own expression. "I wish he were yours." She whispered, a fresh tear shining as it slipped down her cheek. Arik, sweet Arik, closed the distance between them, kissing the salty moisture from her skin. Letting her know as best as he could that he wasn't angry. Another brief silence fell over her as she gathered her thoughts. With a sigh, she continued. "I've been such an awful bitch since you... since you... died. I just keep fucking up." He scowled at her, looking like he couldn't for the world imagine her acting as she described. She had been sweet then, kind and caring. Some of that was coming back, as she interacting with her kingdom. But that core of regret kept a hardness in her. A sort of rot. Her damp blue eyes fluttered shut as she felt him stroke the length of her neck soothingly. He'd done the same years ago, when she had been upset over far lesser things.
"Arik. If I come to find you, would you be there?" She spoke in careful rhythm, as if the thought had just occurred to her. In fact, it was something she contemplated regularly. Those games of crashing towards earth, taunting rulers, tempting Death. If it meant she could be with him again... But no. The look he was giving her now was one of a desperate need to be understood. She was not to follow him into the dark. Not before her time. He glanced to her still-thickened torso, the teats hanging flush with milk. His meaning was clear. Her son, little No-Name back home. He needed her yet. And now she was responsible for a whole kingdom of people. She couldn't leave just yet. She laughed then, surprised that she could. "Arik, what am I supposed to do without you? You've always been the clever one. The brave one. We'd be together if I hadn't held us back." His nose bumped hers, a fierce look in his golden eyes. She wanted to believe it was anger in them, but she knew better. He'd never been able to hold a grudge in life, why should death change that? He forgave her. Or he'd never blamed her to begin with. It was in his face, and his actions. He loved her still.
"Time's almost up." The dark mare was back from where she'd wandered, had given them privacy. Sure enough, the horizon was tinged with the lightest thread of green. The sun was making his way back, surely as ever. Air caught in her throat, as Sabra spun to face her. "Please, please, I'm begging you. Just a little more time. I'll do anything." Her eyes were a bit wild, betraying the raw emotions the evening had drawn forth. The strange lady only shook her head, a touch of pity on her face. "I told you what this meeting would entail, Sabra. You can't go changing the rules now. It's time to say goodbye." Goodbye. Somehow, she'd never been able to bring herself to that point. The willingness to let go of the past, of him. Her head dropped tiredly. It was time, and she couldn't ignore it anymore. She turned back to the waiting chestnut man. "Thank you for spending this time with me. I wish I could have done better by you. You deserved so much more than what you got. Someone who could have given you a home and a family, a long and happy life. As long as I live, I'll wish things had gone differently." The horizon glowed now, a point brighter than the rest betraying where the sun would soon reveal it's face. In a rush, she finished her hard goodbye. "I will never forget this night, as long as I live. And I will live, because you'd be cross if I came to you early, I just know it." She laughed helplessly as the sun sent it's first rays across the sea. "I will tell my son your story. I love you Arik. Goodbye." She pressed her lips against the warmth of his as daylight flooded the bank they stood on.
That unnatural wind drove up again, spinning dust and leaves around until she couldn't see or hear. Like a ghost, it vanished once more. It left a lone mare in it's wake. Of the other two who had been her company that night there was no sign. Only her and the knowledge that just maybe, she could live her life well, without guilt. She went home with dawn showing her the way, and kissed her son's head as he slowly woke, not knowing she'd been gone at all. In her lightened heart, she felt the stirrings of new love.