good at goodbyes
Mosrael emerged from her cave when the first hints of dawn where in the sky. Secluded in her preferred corner of Tephra she climbed atop the ridge of their cave and gazed out across the murky expanse of ocean. Thick smog clung to her angles the thick smell of sulfur accosting the soft of her nose. The breeze off the ocean offered no relief from the harsh summer heat. She missed the sandy shores of her beloved island. Even in the midst of the warmest of summers, the ocean was there to provide reprieve from the heat and there were plenty of large shade trees to hide from the sun. Somewhere, just beyond the depths of her sight, she imagined Ischia as it jutted out from the sea. It’s thick tropical flora overtaking the center of the isle, the white sandy beaches separating the mainland from the sea. The mornings there had always been cooler than the tepid ones in Tephra. She would never truly feel a part of the volcanic kingdom, a monumental part of her would always cling to her Ischian roots. Even still, she could not bring herself to join the general population. Choosing to, instead, keep herself and the twins tucked away in a corner facing her home.
It troubled her why she continued to stay. The fillies had grown stronger and would, more than likely, be able to handle the crossing of the sea. Yet, she couldn’t bring herself to leave. She knew it was largely in part to her unexplainable responsibility to Klaudius. He deserved to know the girls and, despite her confusing feelings toward him, she couldn’t bring herself to steal their twins away from him. He’d apologized, of course. Nearly every morning he would arrive upon the wind, finding her staring out across the ocean, the same words upon his tongue. She suspected that morning would be no different.
The smog seemed to grow thicker around her, and, for a moment, she felt as if she would choke. Her body yearned for fresh air and cool breezes. Regrets threatened to over take her. Everyday she wondered how different things might have been had she’d said goodbye to her parents before she’d fled. Although it pained her heart to admit it, she was unsure when or if she would ever return home. Her duty was to her children and, at the moment, that meant she had to stay away.
The sun had barely slipped past the horizon when Ketzia materialized beside. The first to be born and the first to rise every morning, the filly was nothing but consistent. Sleep was heavy in the filly’s bleary eyes as she clumsily sought out her breakfast. Flicking her tail, Mosrael fought the urge to flinch away from her daughter as the little one began to nurse. Having been a mother for a few months still hadn’t made the task any easier. Mosrael had never been the nurturing type, finding it easier to doll out swift blows than gentle touches. She did feel an affection for her daughters and she felt a protectiveness over them, but when she watched them at play she still didn’t see them as having come from her body.
Ketzia was nearly finished when Kove, the dainty thing that she was, emerged energetic as ever. Dutifully, the elder of the two sisters moved aside to allow the lavender tufted filly to get her fill. Watching the two, it was hard not to think what her parents might think of their newest granddaughters. They resembled Mosrael’s family more than their father’s, although the parts that did belong to him stood out, plain for all to see.
It was just as Kove pulled away that the familiar figure of Klaudius caught their attention. For a moment she had wondered if he had forgotten them, her insecurities bubbling up to the surface. With vacant eyes she watched as he landed and wasted no time in greeting his daughters. Excited, the girls’ greetings were sweet and lilting, completely oblivious to the unresolved tension between their parents. As the fillies bounded off to play, Klaudius’ attention shifted to her. She returned her gaze to the ocean. Words pricked hotly at the edge of her tongue, begging to release their torrent of insults upon him but she kept her silence.
Yes, he had apologized, but words were empty without the actions to prove them. He made it a point to visit them daily, but she still found herself wondering how he filled his time when he wasn’t at her side. Was he with another mare? Did he think of them when he was away? Insecurity after insecurity kept her awake at night – along side a desire that she despised and so desperately wanted to embrace.
@[Klaudius]