the firestarters always get the burns
and the good guys never get the girl
She gives him ample time to think - it seems that without guidance, he would never have dared to take this train of thoughts, and it is good then that she's here. No longer here as Hyaline's Ambassador (though she still is), she's taken on the role of a teacher, a mother, and it fits her like a glove.
But then again, it always had. So she smiles at his distant answers, knowing it will take some time for him to acknowledge to himself what reasons he had in the past for certain moves, and when he does, maybe when he understands why things happened the way they did, he can also find it in himself to forgive. Because it doesn't take a large heart to do so. Only a strong mind. But it will take some more time for him to see that. It will take time, because to learn this truth, he first needs to experience it himself.
And it is complicated. She smiles a little wryly. "It's life." But he seems to find some ease in her advising answer - to change. He still isn't convinced by the rest of her story though - remembering what she'd said, he calls her a higher person. She shrugs. "Maybe. To be honest with you, I needed to forgive so that I could keep my own sanity. And I was one hair away from physically hurting, too." Heck - had she been given the chance, had she been battle-trained, she might have castrated the man. She shivers at the thought now; silly woman, it would not have changed a thing.
Their shoulders brush, and she can't help but feel a friendship blooming, there is a connection, she's a salve to his open wounds, and if she looks closer, he is the same to her. The mirror - the prospect that a monster has changed, can change, and that he probably isn't the only one who can. Given time. Given forgiveness.
He nuzzles her head and she lets him, kindly reminded that the last time she'd felt such a touch was over a year ago, and making her wonder where the clouded palomino man was now. But it's Castile with his two-toned gaze who talks to her, and settles into a lighter conversation, at least, he hopes it to be.
She complies - nods to his words. "I do. I came to the field maybe... 3,5 years ago. I was immediately approached by Kagerus, then the Advisor to Solace, and offered a home where I felt I would belong. To be frank, I've never fit anywhere better. I'd always cared for my younger siblings..." she trails when her memories remind her of the family she will never see again, but shakes her head to clear it quickly. "Caring for those in need, especially children, seemed the only way to go. And it still is." She tells him. "I've a daughter, and a son now too. Not from a father I'd hoped they would have, but, with a surrogate family that loves them and shapes them into better beings than either me or their fathers." she smiles. That's the point, isn't it? What's best for the children. To make them grow and surpass their parents and teachers.
@[Castile]