Jinju;

[Ruan]

ruan

"I've missed you."

Her voice was so full of emotion and it was his nature to lean in and nuzzle her more, pour as much reassurance on her as he could. He'd missed her too. Not as much as she'd missed him, he was realizing. It was such a shorter time for him than it had been for her. And he was so sorry for that, that he'd failed her so badly. He hadn't meant to.

God, but she was so strong. She'd stood her ground just as she always would. She'd survived in every way she'd been allowed to.

He'd failed her.
But she was here with him anyway, in their home.

His face rubbed against her in comfort, to him as well as her, as she spoke again. Of Polaris, her youngest sister he'd brought home. She asked if she was okay and he nodded, though he hadn't helped much with that. He'd put her in danger, honestly. He was a danger to her and the boy. His tumultuous emotions ran so hot, so wild, so suddenly. He'd nearly hurt them. And he didn't know how to resolve it.

He was ashamed of that and feared for them. He was afraid to say it aloud, too. But if anyone could hold his trust, it was Jinju. If anyone could help him, it was her. She was his rock.

Her beautiful crimson eyes peered up at him in question and he found himself brushing the top of his nose against her cheek affectionately. In all the world, she was the only one to have his affection.

He nodded again to confirm the boy was fine and gave her the boy's name that disguised him from those that hunted him. "Rian." His nose followed the path down her jaw, under her chin, rubbing her as lovingly as the wolf inside him ached to. He took a deep breath, let it out slowly as he pulled back to look at her. He couldn't tell her the full truth, not without a magician's dome of silence to protect them from prying eyes and ears.

"He looks as I used to," is all the quiet explanation he could give, though he wished to tell her everything. Most especially that he was not remarried. Because that might matter to her. She hadn't missed anything with him. He was still married. To a woman who had likely turned right around and born children to meaningless men for how little he'd meant to her. While he meanwhile remained hers alone. He was such a fool for his continued faith. Forever the fool.

He swallowed, his blue eyes darkening with the depression he'd buried deep and tried to keep hidden for so long. Even now, he shoved it back down as desperately as he could. He still refused to let it out. His emotions were not for his daughter to bear.

He was a broken man. Had been for so long now.
A young woman had seen a hint of it once.
He'd try not to let any other see it.

"They are nearby," he provided softly, protective of their location even now. But they were near. Close enough for him to guard as violently as he may need to. "Resting." He leaned against her, nuzzling her neck beside her jaw. It felt so good to touch someone again, to feel touch and warmth. To have her close again. "You can lay with them if you'd like?"