11-30-2018, 03:53 PM
There are benefits to having a blind girlfriend.
She does not see how concerned you are when you look at the way the sickness ravages her beautiful body. She does not see the way you struggle for composure as you step closer and the smell of her reminds you of a graveyard, of things already dead. Perhaps most importantly she does not see how your lips curl when you kiss her shoulder and taste feathers and something else you cannot place, something like smoke.
But some of these benefits are neutralized by how well she knows you. You try and try to bury your sadness, but when you murmur her name--- "Ryatah. I'm here--" with all the tenderness you can muster, you think she still might hear the words that go unspoken- "Why did you leave?"
"... Was it me?"
Those words hang on you like her sickness does her, and neither of you knows how to hide or burn or bury your ghosts. So you pretend they're not there, and you whittle away at the inside of yourself where she could never see, even if she had eyes. And if your ghosts keep you up at night, well, that's your burden to bear as best you can.
But now is not the time for that.
Now is the time for strength, and life, and all else will follow later.
Frankly, it terrifies him to see Ryatah like this-- lips stained red with blood, porcelain skin darkened with sweat. But he swallows his fear (just one more hidden thing to add to the hidden collection) so he may lend her what strength he has. Not knowing what else to do, he trails loving kisses down her neck and across her bulging belly. It is agony to watch her struggle in labor, but then it is over and she pops right back up on her feet and their daughter attempts to do the same. If it wasn't for the haggard look in Ryatah's eyes and the tremble in her legs, and obviously the wet bundle at her hooves, he would have no clue she had just brought a new life into the world.
The benefits of a blind girlfriend come back again-- he is beyond grateful that she cannot see the dumbstruck look that crosses his face at the request for a name. "Uh... Max?" The name sounded better in his head, somehow... a strong name for a girl he wants to be strong-- but he can't help but to laugh sheepishly at hearing it spoken aloud. "You should name her, you know I'm no good at these things."
"If it helps, she's green," it is obvious by the tone in his voice that he is proud of this, "and there's a perfect white star, right in the middle of her head," he reaches out gently to place his lips against child's forehead and he breathes in her baby smell, and then he draws back to look his daughter in the eye. It is like looking into a memory from so long ago that it takes him a moment to place it. "Oh! You have your mother's eyes."
Evenstar, not impressed with her green papa, takes a shaky step forward to nurse and he worries the milk will infect her, if the womb did not-- but what choice do they have? With every exhale Ryatah's chest rattles and Skellig's heart sinks. But he moves closer, of course, instead of away, and offers his love a shoulder to lean on.
"How are we going to keep her safe in this world?" He preens gently at Ryatah's forelock and tries to keep his voice neutral. He sounds worried, yes, but not panicked-- not yet.
@[Ryatah] Oops I'm sorry this is so long x_x