12-10-2018, 12:09 AM
Following her conversation with Sunny, she considers leaving the Cove and disappearing back into the depths that she came from, but she can’t bring herself to do it.
Most of it is because she loves the sense of family that she has gained here, even if she hardly knows any of them; she already loves them dearly, from Sunny’s mothers to Ilma and Kensa. Another part of her is terrified; terrified of the plague and the sense of uncertainty outside of the designated safelands, terrified of the unknown. She has only known the Meadow and the Playground and Hyaline in her short life, and now she is beginning to learn the Cove as well. She is scared of what lays outside of them.
She is fighting her emotions just to keep going, and she doesn’t know if it’s a battle that she can win.
The sadness surrounding her is almost palpable as she stumbles along the beach, choking back the sobs that threaten to overwhelm her. I told you that you were going to end up hurt, the voice inside her head complains but she pushes it down, down, down until she can’t hear it anymore. “I just want him to be happy,” she whispers in response when her thoughts finally fall silent. Even if it means sacrificing your own happiness? her inner dialogue asks dryly, and she has to forcibly push the thoughts away again.
Sunlight suddenly beams from behind the clouds and the girl squints as she takes a step toward the ocean, the water too warm for her liking but comforting all the same. She longs for the icy cold mountain lake of Hyaline, but she knows that it is not safe to return there with the plague still stretching across the countryside. Her bear wants to return, even if it’s dangerous, for the snow upon the mountains is the one thing that makes her bear truly happy.
For now, though, the Cove is home, and she shivers as the water laps at her pasterns. She is tempted—almost—to surrender herself to the waves, but that wouldn’t do any good to anyone, and she resists the temptation. She will live on no matter what, no matter how unhappy it makes her. For his happiness, she will continue to live.
@litotes
Most of it is because she loves the sense of family that she has gained here, even if she hardly knows any of them; she already loves them dearly, from Sunny’s mothers to Ilma and Kensa. Another part of her is terrified; terrified of the plague and the sense of uncertainty outside of the designated safelands, terrified of the unknown. She has only known the Meadow and the Playground and Hyaline in her short life, and now she is beginning to learn the Cove as well. She is scared of what lays outside of them.
She is fighting her emotions just to keep going, and she doesn’t know if it’s a battle that she can win.
The sadness surrounding her is almost palpable as she stumbles along the beach, choking back the sobs that threaten to overwhelm her. I told you that you were going to end up hurt, the voice inside her head complains but she pushes it down, down, down until she can’t hear it anymore. “I just want him to be happy,” she whispers in response when her thoughts finally fall silent. Even if it means sacrificing your own happiness? her inner dialogue asks dryly, and she has to forcibly push the thoughts away again.
Sunlight suddenly beams from behind the clouds and the girl squints as she takes a step toward the ocean, the water too warm for her liking but comforting all the same. She longs for the icy cold mountain lake of Hyaline, but she knows that it is not safe to return there with the plague still stretching across the countryside. Her bear wants to return, even if it’s dangerous, for the snow upon the mountains is the one thing that makes her bear truly happy.
For now, though, the Cove is home, and she shivers as the water laps at her pasterns. She is tempted—almost—to surrender herself to the waves, but that wouldn’t do any good to anyone, and she resists the temptation. She will live on no matter what, no matter how unhappy it makes her. For his happiness, she will continue to live.
@litotes