[private] and in my dreams i've kissed your lips a thousand times // oriash

[Kagerus]

and in my dreams...

i've kissed your lips a thousand times

As I stand, honouring my daughter's need for silence, closure, and self expression in the face of one who abandoned that same self, Oriash's composure seems to soften. Not with great evidence, nor with a proclamation of forgiveness or joy; moreso in the way the muscles of her withers relax from their bound-up positions and in the way the shade of her eyes brightens despite the day's overcast light. I take solace in witnessing this shift, no matter how small, and when Oriash deigns to speak again, I listen with rapt attention.

Your ghosts have followed me. For a time, they were my companions, fake though they were. Eventually they were my torment, the thing that haunted me.

She speaks the words with a kindness, as though she knows that this information would hurt me enough (and it does, though I let that show only with a nod of quiet acknowledgment; today is about her truths, not about the shame, guilt, and pity I feel deep within myself). I imagine being a young girl and losing my father, only to have him resurface incessantly and intangibly, trailing me at first to reassure me and at last to torment me. I shudder to think of it.

I cannot simply forget what we have lost, but I would like to try to gain something now. I would like to come to Tephra, at least to visit.

With that, a rush of air exits my lungs, one that I'd held without intending to throughout the entirety of this conversation. With tenderness, I step forward to press my lips to my daughter's antlered forehead, breathing a tangible warmth there for more than a heartbeat before pulling away, allowing that warmth to waft across her whole body.

"Thank you. Thank you for bringing me more joy than I ever thought possible." I smile, stepping back further. "Your mother and I, and all the rest of your family, will be waiting to welcome you there whenever you see fit." With that, I travel to a nearby glade, mentioning as I go that if she'd like to join me there to graze and perhaps chat into the sunset, that she is more than welcome to do so.

kagerus

Enjoying Middle-Age in Tephra | Lover of Solace | Immortal, Dreamweaving Fantasist

@[Oriash]