[private] Strangelet

[Oricle]

i counted the stars tonight, i gathered them all

She blinks as the flakes drip down her lashes. What exactly is it she is supposed to do? She has been alone so long, so very long. Now with the world as it is, it’s getting harder and harder to find places to be alone in. There are no homes for others to meander off to, so they resort to confiscating her little corner. She moves, through the trees, the brush, and the grasses, yet still every time she stops, every time she tries to settle into a quiet little sanctuary it turns out that either someone has beat her too it, or someone is bullying her out of it.

It is one of these moments that she finds herself being approached by a male, a rather large male. He smiles at her, and she glowers at him. She says nothing but his contact with her skin says everything. Her ears flatten, and his lips spread. Finally she finds a moment to escape. She takes off, she runs, her legs stretch and reach to eat the ground from under her. Her mane and tail lash at her skin only to fall behind snagging against anything that reaches to stop her.

Finally she is far away, far away from the enclosed world, the traps of those less dignified than herself. She doesn’t cry, it would do no good. Where feelings had been a void, where the world had been a strange and surreal place, now she envisioned it as a dark cold monster lying in wait to snag its prey. Oricle was not the thing that her mother had thought she was, not who the stars deemed her worthy of being. They gave up on her, just as her sinking heart was ready to for itself. There is no point Light and airy her voice still drifts with the breeze, whimsical in its detached form. Pale eyes look for something, something more than what the naked eye could see, yet, there is nothing.

She looks to the sky, searching for some recognition by the stars, yet they are there, and she is here, and there is no bridge to unite them once again. They have shut her from the heavens, they have deemed her unworthy. What once was a beautiful joyous sky twinkling with the chatter of a world outside of this. Now it cloaks itself in grey sodden garments, grieving the creation of her, turning from her in fear. She was a freak, she had always been a freak, she had been okay with being a freak. She had been content with her life, there was nothing to want, and there was nothing to lose, now though, now she had lost, and she understood a little bit of why others where not so quiet. Why others could not think rationally, she can’t not at this moment, at this moment she looks for a home, and in looking she considers, considers going to a place where others are. Considers surrounding herself with bodies that are not her own.

Oricle

so will you hold cause time is cold
but in your soul im standing by

@[SamShine]

This is long overdue, sorry about that.

[Strangelet]

You've been up and down, down, you've been low, low, low.

I am no stranger to staring at the sky, beseeching forces beyond myself for answers, for guidance, for help navigating the confusing mess this world can be. Whatever part of me was capable of receiving such guidance has been stripped away or smothered into silence, though, and I have given up trying in the months since the world changed so drastically.

Still, I understand the impulse. So when I come across a stranger doing just that, I pause, angling my body (still so oddly empty without my Noctem, and still so deaf and blind without my extra senses) to stand next to her and follow her gaze, staring up at the sky that once might have held answers. To her questions, to mine, it doesn’t much matter right now anyhow.

“Do they answer you?” I don’t mean to ask it, but the words slip out unbidden. I’ve heard whispers of power being returned to some, slow trickles of magic back into the world. Perhaps she is one such soul. But there’s a quiet desperation in the lines of her face, in the tension of her body, that makes me suspect if they ever did, they do no longer.

I search the sky a moment longer, waiting in vain for a nudge, a quiet whisper, a shimmer of knowing or a flash of color rippling like an aurora across the sky. But there is nothing, as there has been nothing since the moment the world remade itself. “It was never the stars for me, not really, but whatever it was is still far too silent.”

Troubled sea so deep, troubled home, no sleep.

photo by Dagwanoenyent-Stock

[Oricle]

i counted the stars tonight, i gathered them all

She doesn’t pay much attention to her surroundings, actually taking the time to think and try to understand herself for the first time is confusing and difficult enough. A waver of her eyes lets the other know that she is surprised by the visitor. She is quickly distracted though, with the words ringing in her head. It was once such a desolate place, void of anything with meaning or understanding. The answer screams in her mind No! they used to, but no! I scream to them and they return me with silence, but for the moment her lips stay sealed. Things used to be simple, grass is green, the sky is blue, the sun is warm, and the moon is cold. Life goes on, really there is never anything more to it. They exist, and they die, they turn to dust, and are no more.

What is so difficult in that? She is content in this knowledge… no let me correct that, she WAS content with that knowledge. Perhaps it was because she had the stars to fill her void, she had a secret closeness that no one else could understand. But here, now, she is left with just the void, and her soul staring down at her without mercy. No, what else is she supposed to say in a moment like this? There isn’t really anything more than that. The rest, the emotions, the needs, the wants, the hunger, and satisfaction are all there to fill the void that the stars left behind. Perhaps its just as simple as she didn’t know there was a void, or there was no void? The other mentions something, something that resonates with the emotions stirring in her mind. The world,, She turns her face from the stars, turns her back on them just as they had her. The world has died, there really is no other explanation of it. Or at least one that she can understand.

She flicks her tail looking the girl up and down, something seemed to click, something felt right with her. Oricle offers a hint of a smile to her new found friend, I’m Oricle, but just as the feeling is there, it is gone. Something flashes back to a night very similar, a night when a horse first demanded something from her. Turning tail on her the second he saw how much of a freak she really could be. She bites the inside of her lip hardening herself against what must come next. It’s in her name, they expect something from her, something more than what she is. Most seem mystified by her, at least until she speaks, until she shows them the reason for her name. If her mother couldn’t except her how could anyone else?

Oricle

so will you hold cause time is cold
but in your soul im standing by

@[Strangelet]