"But the dream, the echo, slips from him as quickly as he had found it and as consciousness comes to him (a slap and not the gentle waves of oceanic tides), it dissolves entirely. His muscles relax as the cold claims him again, as the numbness sets in, and when his grey eyes open, there’s nothing but the faint after burn of a dream often trod and never remembered." --Brigade, written by Laura
It wasn’t per say that she’s hesitant due to the things that happened to her in the past, although she couldn’t say that it didn’t affect her. She just hadn’t expected a friendly face to show up. Vlinder had been ready to face her next abuser and she would’ve gone with him willingly, simply because that was much easier than anything else. However, she would have to admit that with the approach of this grullo mare, her life could be at its turning point.
Yes, Vlinder wanted a home. A home at which she wouldn’t be harassed, wouldn’t be hurt, or used, or threated as a thing. A worthless thing. Because she too was somebody. ”Will.. Will they take me in?” By asking that question the black roan mare let some of her previous insecurities shimmer through, instead of answering in a way that could be interpret that she didn’t care. It might look like she didn’t, or maybe that was only because she that was telling that to herself. Not caring meant not getting emotionally hurt, the physical pain she could handle, but her heart, her heart needed to be kept safe.
"I can;t imagine why they wouldn't," Djinni replies, which she knows is a lie even as she says it. They could always think of something - the roan looks mutinous, she's a stallion in disguise, she won't fall in line and obey properly. Djinni would be all the more fond of her if she were any of those aforementioned things, of course, and the potential of such deception is almost as intriguing as the idea of inviting the mare back to the Sisterhood.
But it is best not to get her hopes up; the horned mare is probably just what she seems on the outside: a sad soul in need of time to rest.
Still, Djinni knows there was some uncertainty in the way that she'd answered the question, and given the hesitation in the other female's eyes, she cannot quite bring herself to leave it at that. "Yes," she adds, "They'll take you in. As a Sister myself, I'm free to invite whoever I please, even if I don't know their name." At that she smiles, trying to diffuse the rather serious turn of their conversation.
If her current state would’ve allowed herself to be at least somewhat expressive, she would’ve cocked up an eyebrow. Vlinder can easily come up with several reasons why they wouldn’t want to take her in, look at her tainted appearance only. Next to that, self-esteem was something the blue roan mare didn’t know, not able to appreciate even a slightest thing about her herself. So why would other people want her around? She definitely wouldn’t.
However, after a slight pause, the grullo mare once again tells her that they would take her in, that they would accept her, more or less. The corners of her mouth twitch slightly as the stranger remarks about not knowing her name, even so much, that Vlinder has to look away. Amusement and joy was something she hadn’t experienced in a while, and that this mare could so easily get to her, was both frightening and addictive at once. ”Vlinder. My name if Vlinder” she replies after a short pause, now meeting the other’s gaze again, hesitantly returning a small smile.
”What do they call you?” As she speaks Vlinder’s voice is soft, careful and hesitant. Since she had met Tarnished this was the first time that she had showed interested – genuine interest – in another, breaking the vicious cycle that had consumed her life too long already. It is scary though, opening up yourself like this, letting someone in, show interested. Before all she had showed interest in had been taken away from her. Not caring had been a far safer option for her heart, but maybe, maybe she wouldn’t have to live like that anymore. Yet at the same time Vlinder was scared of the hope, afraid it would be crushed once again.
There is something there, for just a moment, and that something is not sadness. Djinni grins as the other mare looks away, and is still smiling when she looks finally looks back.
"Vlinder," she repeats, "That's a lovely name. I'm Djinni, but you can call me whatever you'd like - I answer to most anything."
And she does; there had been a time when she'd changed names as often as she'd changed her face. These days, she does neither as frequently as she had in the past. Her coat has been mousy grey and her name the same expanded version of her namesake for nearly a year. From time to time she does feel the need to change, but she does that alone, in places far from prying eyes.
"Do you like the ocean, Vlinder?" She asks, her dark eyes curious. "That's where the Sisterhood is, so I hope you do."
She doesn’t know what to think of the smile that lingers on the grullo’s lips, but Vlinder cannot say that she doesn’t like it. It seemed genuine enough, compared to the smiles Ellyse had offered her in the past, this one was much more friendly. Or she hoped at least. Who knew what she would get herself into otherwise. At the same time, the blue roan – temporary – unicorn had been ready for the next abusive stallion to pick her up, so it couldn’t be much worse than that. And the smiles and kind words, spoken in such way (even if Djinni didn’t mean anything with it), managed to reach her core.
With a dip of her head she replies to the other mare’s introduction. She wanted to say that it was nice to meet her – because it genuinely was – but she could not yet bring herself to it. Yes, Djinni did something to her, but a broken thing wasn’t that easily mend.
”The ocean?” she repeats rather dull, her lips tasting the word for the first time. ”I’ve never seen the ocean.” It was almost a statement like that, but true nonetheless. She was born in the Gates, only to move to a herdland through the field. Vlinder had never been much of an explorer, at home she was at least safe from those who were to bully or to pity her.
As she shifts her weight to another leg, a soft groan is pulled from her lips. The pregnancy took its toll on her, but it wouldn’t take much longer before she would be ready to give birth. Not that she wanted to think about it, the child was nothing to her. And of later business. ”What is it like?” the way she asks is almost like she’s indifferent, but once again a small glimpse of curiosity shines through.
