”I want to,” she agreed, and he turned to guide them to it, that special little spring tucked away where no one seemed to roam. It was beautiful, the trees so dense with low-hanging vines, thick canopies blocking out the sky save for little pinholes of light. A hidden little oasis just for them. She snuggled closer into his side as they walked, brushing along his neck and making his skin tingle. ”Thank you,” she murmured, and he pressed a light kiss to her cheek. ”Of course. I will always want you to be happy.”
He led the way to the water, hearing her disappointment that they were walking on top, instead of bathing within. His pulse kicked a little faster just thinking about it, about the water slicked down her sides again, but he kept it from reaching his smile as he stomped the surface and sent a splash flying towards her. He laughed, watching her dip her head to almost splash him back. But she stopped, and just trailed her nose through it instead, a smooth caress that looked so solemn and sad to him.
His mirth died away and he walked back to her, coaxing her down with a blanket of a wing to lay beside him. ”I really am sorry I walked away that night,” he told her quietly, kissing her neck just beside her cheek. ”But I had to. I wanted you too badly. In ways that I shouldn’t.” His voice faded more and more as he continued, guilty for being so wrong, and guilty for still wanting it. He was trying to do right, as Father taught him, but sometimes what was supposed to be wrong just felt so right, and it was hard to keep it straight.
”So, you see now? It wasn’t because I didn’t want you. It was because I wanted you too much.” He still did, he still fought it, tried to be good as Father told him. Tried to do the right thing. It was still a work in progress, maybe, but he was trying. He didn’t want to be like their grandfather. He didn’t want Dad to say his name in that same way.