undo the knots of the past // swxrds pony

[takei]

Takei

Grief aches. It clings deeply, heavily to his heart and the cavities found there. It throbs with each pull of his lungs, each twitch of his muscles. It strings itself along the linings and bones and nerves and vessels of his body. Takei feels it — grief, despair, trauma, depression — in every cell that makes up his body.

It holds him close with its dark, slimy fingers and it won’t let him go.

Takei moves with it. He tries to find his way blindly through the field, then into the meadow. The scents are familiar but powerful, the sounds are gentle but loud. His eyesight had melted away with the island he had grown to love — and those who had lived on it with him — and his other senses seemed heightened somehow, as though his body were overcompensating for the lack of vision.

The headache never stops. When he’d first woken up among the spring grasses in the field, his whole body ached as though he had been run over by a terrified, stampeding herd. Those bruises have faded, yet the dull throb among the lining of his cranium has yet to cease. The deep gashes in his thigh have begun to heal over, though the scabbing that covers it is thin and breaks easily. Every time he feels the sharpness of the scab cracking, he is reminded of all he has lost.

Orion. Cassiopeia. Draco. Andromeda. The island.

So many more.

Takei inhales sharply, among the loud chatter and thick scents of the meadow. He rests his left shoulder against the strength of a tree. Although he cannot see anything — he had never taken sight for granted until it was suddenly removed from him — he knows he can rely on the support and consistency of the trunk, planting its roots firmly in the ground and stretching its arms high in the sky.

watch the mind run far away, way ahead of us

@[swxrdsandpxns] Feel free to post whomever back to him, I remembered you saying you wanted some Kuna words

[Scissorhands]

I existed because I dreamed

I roamed back from Hyaline confused and shaken. Unsure of if I should go back, or if I should continue my meaningless wanderings. Solace had given me hope for a better future, but I wondered if I even deserved it. 

I guess it didn't matter now. 

I had taken my time on the journey back, and when I arrive in the meadow, spring is in full swing. The sun is hot against the length of my body, my winter coat beginning to shed. The lush flora is plentiful, the grass perfect for munching. I keep my head low in it, trying to conceal the scarred portrait of my face. Springtime brings many other horses to the meadow, and I would rather keep myself hidden to avoid the lingering eyes and hateful snickers. 

I take view of my surroundings before I depart from the comfort of the grass, and notice a man leaning heavily against a tree. He looks distracted, depressed, and almost as lonely as I do. I approach slowly, careful not to startle him, until I noticed the clouded film of his eyes. 

Blindness. 

Something I hoped I wouldn't have to experience in my life. My heart aches for the stranger, and I contemplate if I should intrude or not. Maybe he needed a friend...but who would want to be friends with me?

I ignore the anxiety, and with a burst of courage, move boldly towards him. "Hello." 

Scissorhands

@[Takei] Awh thank you for the words Kuna! Excited to see where this may go

[takei]

Takei

He misses color. Despite all of the other things he’s lost in the past few weeks (his friends, his lover, his island), he aches for bright, beautiful colors almost as much as he aches for them. He misses the way they drape across shapes, reflecting the light of the sun. It’s a strange thing — feeling the warmth of the sun but being unable to see the way it casts shadows on the ground. All his life Takei has been able to see the source of the heat that dapples his shoulders. Yet suddenly that knowledge has been ripped from him.

He isn’t sure what time of day it is anymore.

The voice startles Takei from his thoughts. Without his normal habits (chasing the seagulls, wading in the ocean, watching the newborns learn to walk and run and jump) he often finds himself getting lost in himself. More specifically, lost in the bottomless pit of his grief. His aching head turns toward the sound of the voice, though it’s obvious from the low, careful swing of his head that he isn’t sure exactly where the sound came from.

“Hello?” His voice echos the first, though there is the uplift of a question at the end of it. He is thrown off by his lack of sight, swimming in an unfamiliar sea. Takei blinks hard in a vain attempt at clearing the darkness from his milky eyes. “Who’s there? Who are you?” Anxiety begins to brew in his chest, sharp and bitter.

Takei knows of the predators of Beqanna. He also knows he isn’t fit enough to survive should one of them attack.

watch the mind run far away, way ahead of us

@[Scissorhands]

[Scissorhands]

I existed because I dreamed

The deep baritone of my voice had startled the man in front of me. I myself jump too, for no other reason other than the fact he had done it first, and I wasn't expecting it (silly me, he is blind, one should expect a bit of fright). My eyes observe the swing of his head in my general direction, how he blinks his eyes and begs for sight, the furrow of his brow and his anxious questioning. 

He's not used to it... I think to myself. He must be newly blind... 

Empathy swells within my breast, how awful a fate that must be. I reach my muzzle out to touch his shoulder, as my father had when I was a child, but I stop myself. He is a stranger, and that wasn't how strangers acted around each other. Instead, I bring my scarred head back to my chest, staring down at the stallion before me. 

"I'm sorry," Words flow breathlessly from my lips. "I didn't mean to startle you. I'm Scissorhands." Still, my name feels strange on my tongue. I know it well and have been called it many times, but have rarely introduced myself to anyone. Anxiety clouds my mind (should I run from him now, or should I stay and talk?). I let out a gentle snort, trying to keep the ever-growing storm within me calm. 

Scissorhands

@[takei]

[takei]

Takei

The instinct that runs through a horse is deeply rooted. Takei has felt it many times in the past weeks since the island melted from under his feet. There are behaviors and habits hard-wired into the very marrow of his bones he had never recognized until recently — things like the instinct to run, to find shelter, to stick nearby well-traveled areas, to graze when he’s bored. They come from a long line of ancestors dating back to the beginning of time, even before Beqanna surfaced, and the knowledge of those ancestors have been passed down through the years.

Although Takei doesn’t see the other stallion startle as well, he hears the thud of his hooves slamming on the dirt and feels the crackle of nervous energy in the air. On any other day (perhaps a day on his island, with Orion at his side instead of this stranger) he might have thrown his neck back and laughed at the humor of the situation. There is nothing to fear aside from two fully grown men scaring each other.

There is an instant apology — whether because of his blindness or startling him, Takei isn’t quite sure — and the red and white stallion heaves out a relieved breath. He should have known that no bears or wolves or cougars would be in the midst of the Meadow, especially in the middle of the daytime. “It’s my bad, Scissorhands… I’m not used to blindness and it’s quite frightening when you’re not sure who’s lurking over your shoulder.”

There’s the flicker of a soft smile on his dry lips. “I’m Takei.”

watch the mind run far away, way ahead of us

@[Scissorhands] Sorry it took so long for me to reply! :/