01-16-2019, 03:20 PM
I've never seen him so cold. Impassively looking at me when I can't look at him. It washes over me like a wave of ice, chilling me and taking my shakiness with it. If he can be unfeeling, well, so can I. The breeze is kicking up, and I revel in the feeling of it combing through my mane. It's as comforting as an old friend when I feel so very alone, and helps me face my reality.
Hearing her name on his lips. It drops from his tongue effortlessly, and I nod at the correction. He's changed, I realize, from when we'd first met. Lost his kindness, perhaps. I find myself nodding again to myself, reconciling my idea of him with the beast before me. Watch as he absorbs my words and supplies his own monosyllabic comments. Little flames that eat my emotions down to the bone, sucking the marrow and spitting out whatever hard core remains.
My lips purse as he gets irritated, volatile as ever and no longer caring to hide it. Feathers stand on end along my wings unbidden, a subconscious reaction to the danger I have such a talent for putting myself in. Puff up, look bigger than you are, maybe the threat will go away. A pastel hawk with nothing to lose. Someway, somehow, he's put flint to my dying fire, and I want to lash out again. I want to be angry, to shout and fight, if only it would make him care.
"I will apologize when I'm in the wrong. I can admit it, even if you can't. There is always going to be a piece of me that loves you, but I can't, I won't, wait for you to love me. I'm not sorry for that." The delicate petals of my own ears tipped backward, finally looking at him full on. Cold, impassive. I tried to remind myself even as my voice rose. One hind hoof thudded into the ground sharply, tail flipping in the wind like a flame.
The defiant lift of my head is back, even as my heart shrinks in my chest. I feel, and I can't apologize for it. And I can't hold on any longer to a heart that won't be held. "Be free, then, you stubborn ass. Congratulations on your home, I hope for your people's sake that you don't run from it when things get difficult." Too much. It's too much today, and I am done with feeling everything.
@[Castile]
Hearing her name on his lips. It drops from his tongue effortlessly, and I nod at the correction. He's changed, I realize, from when we'd first met. Lost his kindness, perhaps. I find myself nodding again to myself, reconciling my idea of him with the beast before me. Watch as he absorbs my words and supplies his own monosyllabic comments. Little flames that eat my emotions down to the bone, sucking the marrow and spitting out whatever hard core remains.
My lips purse as he gets irritated, volatile as ever and no longer caring to hide it. Feathers stand on end along my wings unbidden, a subconscious reaction to the danger I have such a talent for putting myself in. Puff up, look bigger than you are, maybe the threat will go away. A pastel hawk with nothing to lose. Someway, somehow, he's put flint to my dying fire, and I want to lash out again. I want to be angry, to shout and fight, if only it would make him care.
"I will apologize when I'm in the wrong. I can admit it, even if you can't. There is always going to be a piece of me that loves you, but I can't, I won't, wait for you to love me. I'm not sorry for that." The delicate petals of my own ears tipped backward, finally looking at him full on. Cold, impassive. I tried to remind myself even as my voice rose. One hind hoof thudded into the ground sharply, tail flipping in the wind like a flame.
The defiant lift of my head is back, even as my heart shrinks in my chest. I feel, and I can't apologize for it. And I can't hold on any longer to a heart that won't be held. "Be free, then, you stubborn ass. Congratulations on your home, I hope for your people's sake that you don't run from it when things get difficult." Too much. It's too much today, and I am done with feeling everything.
@[Castile]