only love could kill me; noah

[leliana]

I rise from my scars. nothing hurts me now.

Pieces of her past life—of her past self—lay scattered around Beqanna.

In Nerine, there is a woman with the ability to play games with your vision. She is strong and clever and yet felt like a poison on Leliana’s tongue. In Tephra, there is a man made of mottled gold who was the only parental figure she ever had. He was brave and kind, and even now, she goes to him for the council she needs—even when he burns with more rage than consumes her. In Loess, there is a man with scales and serpentine eyes who breathed war and yet set fire to a broken heart. Somewhere—somewhere—there is a man with bone armor who clutches to her heart in a way she cannot name. 

And in the Pampas, there is a mare who is the last tie she has to one of her only friends. 

She is not sure if she comes because of the political games she must play now or because she feels a draw to the young girl she once met curled around Rhonen’s legs. Because there is a piece of her that has never stopped mourning his death and how she could not stop it. She could now, maybe. She could be strong enough to keep him alive, to protect him from the bodies that fell atop him. But she wasn’t then. She could barely seal a wound before another opened. She fell asleep to the sight of him dying for months.

Even in this new life, with so much of her sealed away, she feels that sorrow and grief that feels like fury in her mouth. She feels the indignation of it all, the tears on her cheeks, the scream that scrubbed her throat raw. It causes a shiver to run up her spine as she appears on the border of the quiet herd land, her glowing golden eyes peering out into the darkness. Perhaps it was unwise to come to a land that still remained under Loess control—to a mare with alliances and loyalties she can only guess at—but there is a part of her now that hungers for the risk. That cannot stop herself from taking the gamble.

And, if she was honest with herself, there is a quiet piece of her that just wants to see Noah.

To look in her eyes and see Rhonen reflected back at her.

@[Noah]