06-07-2019, 05:56 PM
i've gone crazy, couldn't you tell?
threw stones at the stars but the whole sky fell
It’s not fear.
But what does she know?
What does she know about anything?
Uncertainty, maybe. Because she’s never been anything but alone. And her father is dead. Or gone, but she doesn’t know the difference. She sees her mother sometimes but only ever from a distance.
Or perhaps it is fear.
And she’s standing on the edge of a meadow and she thinks she’s been here before.
She sees him. He’s the first thing she sees. Stark black, so thin that she can count the bars of his ribcage and each notch in the ladder of his spine. She feels something then that is neither fear nor uncertainty. It is something wicked that twists in the pit of her gut – sympathy, maybe, or sadness.
“Hello,” she says and the voice is neither warm nor beautiful. Perhaps if she had inherited more of her father’s goodness or more of her mother’s inherent badness, she might have sounded different. She might have been different.
“Are you alright?” she asks and does not think that it might be rude to so immediately draw attention to the fact that he looks as if he has not eaten in months.
And if he’s not alright, if he lifts his head and says ‘no’, what will she do about it? What business does she have asking at all? She swallows thickly, catching her teeth on the bitter taste of self-loathing.
daughter of kensley & anaxarete
forgotten girl