Why?
The cremello chokes on the question, golden eyes panicked and searching when he lurches from a fitful sleep. He has asked himself that everyday since he and Kensa parted. Why? Why tear me to shreds and then take what little I had left? Why push me away? He cannot even begin to piece together what his once lover’s reasons were - he just knows that he is full of pain, of ache, of a poison that will not paralyze him fast enough.
Litotes has spent his time avoiding Starsin. Most days, he sneaks into Loess and whickers for the twins to come say hello. They will trot after him faithfully, but the suspicious eye of Draco haunts him. The boy can tell his mother of every broken piece of his heart, Lie knows this, but some foolishly trusting part of him believes the demon to hold his father in higher regard. Maybe his poorly reassuring “I’m going to talk to her” actually does work, though Draco can see through those empty words to the fear that resides beneath them.
I cannot avoid her forever, he thinks as his head hangs low to the ground soon after forcing himself to his hooves. Both sullen eyes peer upward, cautiously examining the scenery as Pangea fades into the rainbow of autumn that Hyaline is. He skirts the border, curling his lip and baring his teeth at the constantly lingering scent of Kensa.
There is anger there, so much fucking anger. He knows he is not done with her, at least not until he screams at her that her lack of regret will never fucking matter, because she has always been chosen by him. She has nothing to regret. He wants to fade into his lion just to stalk her, roar in her face and banish her from the East; but, he does not, even as his hackles raise in suppressed fury.
Loess is around him before he realizes it, and Starsin is before him before he can mask himself in shadow. Litotes rears his head back, eyes guarded as he takes three steps backward. “Starsin,” he grumbles, her name harsher and colder and much more of a growl than he means it to be. There is no anger, and there is not a void of emotion; there is only caution and the tiniest glimmer of fear.
He breaks, though. He breaks like he always does when he is around her. She has never been easy to resist.
“Why did you do this to me?”
i don't want your pity, i just want somebody near me
guess i'm a coward, i just want to feel all right
