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  • Beqanna

    COTY

    Assailant -- Year 226

    QOTY

    "But the dream, the echo, slips from him as quickly as he had found it and as consciousness comes to him (a slap and not the gentle waves of oceanic tides), it dissolves entirely. His muscles relax as the cold claims him again, as the numbness sets in, and when his grey eyes open, there’s nothing but the faint after burn of a dream often trod and never remembered." --Brigade, written by Laura


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    Hi, I'm new.
    #1
    I watched from up high, a smile curving my mouth as the warm glow from the houses in the bowl flickered across my face; everything I loved was burning down and I had never felt so happy, the way their blood mingled with the mud made me feel quite sappy. 'They'll hang me for this,' I thought, the smile growing wider still; I watched as the metal rooster fell and the barn collapsed, next was the old dairy mill. I heard their screams, oh how they screamed, I relished in their tears; a boy whose name had no meaning, a pendant dangling from my neck, I stood up tall and bade goodbye to them all before I turned my back.  I disappeared in the marsh, never to be seen or heard from again, though I often thought 'oh why not?' before I came to my senses--those people would string me up by the neck. No, I wouldn't go back to the corrie; I left my troubles there, they've been dead for years, and I have never once been sorry.

    One from one, yo. -drops the mic-

    KINGDOM, IT'S FOR A KINGDOM.
    Vanquish x Nocturnal
    equus mutatio, immortality, disease manipulation, trait immunity
    #2
    is this from a kingdom or from a herd?
    #3
    Kahz- It's kingdom, it says it below the post xD

    nvm..I get it..where is it from. I can't read
     
    Anneliese - Pothos
    #4
    This was my first steal in literally years, so sorry it didn't go quite as smoothly as I would have hoped. :/
    I'm not very good at this, so feedback would be appreciated!

    I watched from up high, a smile curving my mouth as the warm glow from the houses in the bowl [watched from up high, mountains, houses in the bowl - bowl shaped valley surrounded by mountains - The Valley] flickered across my face; everything I loved was burning down and I had never felt so happy, the way their blood mingled with the mud made me feel quite sappy. 'They'll hang me for this,' [Hang me for this - hanging, gallows - Gallows] I thought, the smile growing wider still; I watched as the metal rooster fell and the barn collapsed, next was the old dairy mill [old dairy mill - Fennick means dairy farm]. I heard their screams, oh how they screamed, I relished in their tears; a boy whose name had no meaning [if you look up the meaning for Rhonan, the name has no meaning], a pendant dangling from my neck [if you google the name Rhonan, Rhonan pendants are on the first page], I stood up tall and bade goodbye to them all before I turned my back.  I disappeared in the marsh [Fennick also means "fen or marsh"], never to be seen or heard from again, though I often thought 'oh why not?' before I came to my senses--those people would string me up by the neck [string me up by the neck, hanging, gallows - Gallows]. No, I wouldn't go back to the corrie [a corrie is a cirque - a half-open steep-sided hollow at the head of a valley or on a mountainside - The Valley]; I left my troubles there, they've been dead for years, and I have never once been sorry.

    Rhonan from Fennick and Gallows of the Valley (posted before Demian officially became King), for a quick friendly visit.
    Vanquish x Nocturnal
    equus mutatio, immortality, disease manipulation, trait immunity
    #5
    success.
    the three days were up before demian was added as co-ruler, so this is a success.
    #6
    Out of curiousity - i used these exact same clues for fennick in my shaytan post, but you said they weren't good ones. can you please explain why these are valid and mine werent?
    #7
    good point.

    as Sarah pointed out, the clues used for Fennick in this steal were actually to Fenwick, so for the same reason that Shaytan's steal with invalid, this one is too. I didn't catch the difference in name meanings because remembering steals for 3 months is not my strong suit, and I assume clues to be for the name if they say they are (Shaytan's 'solve' mentioned that the clues were for the name fenwick not fennick, which is why i caught that one and not this one).

    were the steal just from gallows it would be a success, but with this pointed out it's not. sorry for getting your hopes up!
    #8
    In my opinion (and I don't do much with steals so if someone else wants to weigh in as well feel free), if you're using definitions/clues that relate to a different spelling of the character's name, that should be indicated in the steal, as well as at least one clue to the horse's name as it is directly spelled.
    And while googling "fennick name meaning" does bring up resutls for fenwick, googling "fennick name" only has one result pointing to fenwick, and just googling "fennick" brings up no fenwick results at all (when I do it, at least). So the clues are a bit too removed from the orgiinal name for this to be valid, sorry.




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