04-29-2020, 02:57 PM
The lavender that grew around Murmuring Rivers, that had always caught in her and Lilli’s manes. She remembers the smallest smiles Alvaro, her dark, brooding cousin would give her as she closed her eyes for their games of hide and seek and he didn't think she would notice. Her mother’s sweet humming that could soothe even the darkest of hearts if only they would listen. Her father and his stern face that would soften as he took his only daughter for a day of play at Windskeep’s glistening lake. She remembers huddling together with her many cousins as Valerio would gather the children around for a wild tale of Legado the Great or Ichiro the Fierce.
She wonders, for a brief moment, what it would be like if they could go back to those times.
But they are gone already, they were gone when they were in them.
Too fleeting.
She is a drop of sunlight, a phenomena, because the sun is not supposed to exist where the moon does, but Elaina is here all the same. And Lilli laughs. Lilli laughs and Elaina knows she is in love with that sound, the beauty of it, the melody. It is more beautiful than any song Elaina could possibly sing, Lilli is so much more than Elaina could ever be and she should be envious, she should rage against her crimson, burn with jealousy until she turns green. But all she can do is bathe into the laughter that rings from Lilli that puts the stars to shame. Elaina can only ever, will only ever show true, wonderful love towards her cousin.
“Only because you told me to try to find some buttercups to put in Alvaro’s mane!” Elaina accuses with a quick smile and a bout of ready laughter that is so easy to find. How long has it been since she has laughed like this? Bonfires, dancing, shadows, spinning, racing, twirling, breathing, smoke, starlight. “I will still find you.” All come to mind.
Lilli would no doubt argue with Elaina until she were blue in the face if she uttered this thought allowed, but Elaina feels it to be true all the same. Lilli owed her no apology, and that stubborn, stubborn girl will stand by that until the sun truly falls from the sky and lands up her golden coat rather than just providing the illusion of so. But any hard edges, any sharp corners soften the moment she feels Lilli’s touch upon her.
The cold of the water is only thing that snaps her from the comfortable trace she felt herself dipping into. “Reminds me of the time we decided to swim in the lake after dark,” she says with a laugh. Sneaking out, Lilli from her meadow, Elaina from her cavern. She laughs at the memory before another one sparks her. Liam and Tarian doing the same action. The twins swimming at night when Elaina had caught them. ‘You know there are sharks in there,’ she has said. Tarian had scowled and Liam had placed his wing on his head, a mock dorsal fin. Simple, simple times, even then she would consider it so. With the threat of Ostere looming over their heads and Elaina in love with a man with a years too old and far too wrong for her.
“Only someone fearless could tell their loved ones they are wrong,” Elaina says to her, appreciates her for what her crimson cousin is. Lilli has given Elaina far more than she ever deserved. Had given it so freely, so beautifully and Elaina will forever be eternally grateful.
She laughs then, she cant help it. “Because I always knew the view was better.” It is a silly excuse, a childish excuse, but one she uses all the same. Elaina has always loved danger, but Elaina needs to learn to balance herself first. The palomino follows with her own blue eyes out over the darkened water.
When she was afraid of the dark?
Elaina so desperately wants to tell her that she still is.
And that, that was the problem with so many things.
“Yes,” she says laughing again, huddling ever closer to her cousin. “You asked me what I had to be afraid of,” she says, and in truth, back then, there had been nothing she could not face. But now, Elaina remembers shadows creeping upon her as she tries to light her way through them. “I wish I could be more like you, Lilli.” It is something she has always thought, always known, but this may be the first time she has ever spoken it.
“You’re my best friend.” It is not a confession, it cant be, when they both already know how true it is.
tried to keep her quiet, but she's screaming inside me