[open] loneliness has always been with me, any

[astra]

A falling star fell from your heart and landed in my eyes
I screamed aloud, as it tore through them, and now it's left me blind

She wonders what it’s like to have a mother who’s ‘old and chill’. As far as she knows, her mother is neither of those things. Astra had spent most of her earliest days choking on her mother’s grief and panic and guilt. Her mother who could not even touch her, who had to employ the help of a magician to see that Astra was fed. But she still smiles something toothy and hopeful, nodding like she understands.

She considers Ridiculous’s question, pressing her mouth into a thin line as she nods. “Yes, she’s sad,” she admits. But she does not allow herself to dwell on the sadness lest it begin to swell up in her chest. “She left me in Tephra with Isilya so that I wouldn’t have to feel her sadness and because Isilya could make sure I got to eat when I was small.” She rolls her shoulders and it occurs to her then that Isilya is like a mother to her, too.

He laughs at her answer and then begins to recite his list of things he likes and she watches with a bemused expression. There is a certain light in her eyes as he takes to dancing and she stifles a laugh, not wanting him to think that she’s laughing at him. “You’re a good dancer,” she tells him, allowing herself to grin.

“Where’d you learn to dance?”

ASTRA

ASTRA

@[Ridiculous]