I tried to sell my soul last night
Funny, he wouldn't even take a bite
He'd never shown himself before because nothing of him was worth showing. The cracks she was now peering through revealed only the blackened depths of whatever remained of his soul. He'd never admitted to love because he wasn't even certain he was capable of it. Even now he's not certain that's what she truly stirred within him rather than something darker, something far more base.
Ashhal has never exposed quite so much of himself before, and he is surprised to learn that rather than vulnerable, he suddenly feels more free than he has in ages. As though releasing everything he'd repressed for years had lifted an immense weight from him.
Perhaps that is why it is hard to feel guilt for the pain his words had caused her. Or perhaps it's simply that he's glad she finally understands. By that same token, he believes her when she claims she never meant to cause him pain either. It seems they had that much in common.
His own wings lift in response to her agitation, jaw working as he tries to formulate a response. To his surprise, the anger doesn't return as he had expected it to. Instead there is only acceptance. The unexpected realization that he wasn't the one that could decide for her what she wanted to do.
"I can't," he finally replies in a low, almost fatalistic tone. His eyes jump sharply to hers, his jaw tightening. "Your blind fucking obedience is never what I wanted."
And it wasn't. Even if he could trust a choice he made for her, he knew it would never give him satisfaction.
"There's nothing left of me to save anyway. You're wasting your time trying."
