[private] I could take the whole world with me

[Altissima]

Altissima’s eyes roll at Tarian’s banter but there’s a smile there too and she cannot think of something to retort back. That last cool remark has been warmed by the water, by the surprising pleasantness of this night.

What are they doing?

Her eyes drop to his when he replies to her thanks, but she wishes she had kept being a coward. She wishes she had kept looking away. Because when he looks at her the way he is now, Altissima wants to stay here. She wants the wild world she loves to consist of just this hot spring, just them - illuminated by his glow and her damn twinkling. She wants to jump off the cliff she’s standing at. She loves jumping off cliffs, it’s thrilling and the way her heart races now reminds her of that feeling. She could leap tonight and not worry about what will happen in the morning.

For a brief, shining moment this idea does not scare her and she takes a step closer, reaching out to him, feeling like she’s moving in slow motion as she does. “Tarian…” She’s never actually called him by his name before and there’s a question there, in the softness of how her voice forms those syllables, and when she hears it she freezes just before her muzzle can brush against his moonlit skin.

If it is a question, there is a chance of the answer being a no. She suddenly thinks that if she does this, if she gives into the feeling that is building inside of her, that’s it. It’s too big, too overwhelming, and it’ll consume her.

And she is not the only one that needs to jump off this particular cliff, it requires company. If he rejects her, she is painfully aware of how much that will hurt. If he makes a joke at her expense now, it’ll pierce right through her.

So she will not give him the chance.

Altissima recoils slowly, first her muzzle and then her body - stepping back out of the hot spring and feeling a chill that is not related to the air seep into her as she does.

Her eyes dart around, but keep returning back to him - they shine a pale blue with the sadness that’s creeping in. Words fumble out as she shakes her head, the warm water dripping off of her body. “I… I’m sorry. I need to...” But what excuse could she possibly give? He knows she has no home, no ties, nowhere to be except wherever she wants to be. And she won’t let herself be where she wants to be at this moment because it is too dangerous.

So she lets the end of that sentence fade away as she turns and unfurls her wings to leave.

altissima

@[Tarian]