07-02-2021, 09:51 PM
mazikeen
Mazikeen’s efforts to close herself off from her memories of kindness, to keep her mind simmering in vague rage to avoid anything and everything else, are not strong enough to withstand the presence of her young friend and the strained sincerity with which he speaks. She’s the one to break eye contact, closing hers after his words and feeling them permeate her heart and wrench it in her chest. “Don’t say that.” The words come out in a whisper harsher than she intends and she shakes her head afterwards as though that will dissipate the tone from the air between them.
She is fraying at the edges, but she does not mean to be harsh with him, only with herself. She doesn’t know what to do with this sadness she is trying not to feel or how much she wants to find comfort in those words instead.
How is it possible that they make her so happy that there is no actual joy, just devastation?
She’s afraid of this friendship, afraid of the day when it might be Sela instead of Sabal. Would Gale ask her to banish him too or would he request something else if he knew how much the young angel meant to her? Mazikeen cannot stomach the idea of being the one who tells Selaphiel that he cannot stay here anymore, that she was revoking the rule change she had made for him.
Mazikeen is scared, right down to her core. And she knows she cannot do this on her own, but she also knows she has no choice because of what it means to involve anyone else.
“I don’t deserve that loyalty from you, Sela.” She finally tells him in a soft voice when she opens her eyes again and there are tears in them, so many they cloud her vision of him.
She is fraying at the edges, but she does not mean to be harsh with him, only with herself. She doesn’t know what to do with this sadness she is trying not to feel or how much she wants to find comfort in those words instead.
How is it possible that they make her so happy that there is no actual joy, just devastation?
She’s afraid of this friendship, afraid of the day when it might be Sela instead of Sabal. Would Gale ask her to banish him too or would he request something else if he knew how much the young angel meant to her? Mazikeen cannot stomach the idea of being the one who tells Selaphiel that he cannot stay here anymore, that she was revoking the rule change she had made for him.
Mazikeen is scared, right down to her core. And she knows she cannot do this on her own, but she also knows she has no choice because of what it means to involve anyone else.
“I don’t deserve that loyalty from you, Sela.” She finally tells him in a soft voice when she opens her eyes again and there are tears in them, so many they cloud her vision of him.
@Selaphiel