[private] When did the colors fill in the spaces where there were none?

[Fyr]

I'll settle for the ghost of you.

Silence is not something he has ever been uncomfortable with. Aela had seen that in him and had known exactly what wisdom and advice to give him to enhance this natural feature about himself. It wasn’t so different from the parenting Lilybee’s father had also given her, the power of observation in his long years as a diplomat.

Sometimes silence was the best gentle push you could give someone to spill all their little secrets, their private pain, the things that make them tick. The ammunition you might need to destroy them. Give them the room of silence, the space of saying nothing, and one can’t seem to help themselves to fill it. Of course his mother had other things in mind when she had schooled him in this topic but he found it could apply to a matter of situations and with her, this is no different.

Except Lillibet seems just as comfortable in the quiet stillness of their moments together and he doesn’t expect her to answer his question at all. He’s come to find in the short time of knowing her that the young Crown of Pangea tended to always do the opposite of what he expected. It was one of the many things that he was growing to like about her. The pause extends and for a brief moment, with her as close as she is, he wonders if his skin might steam if she brushed her damp body against his own. He hesitates, considering closing that very small gap between them.

And then she begins to speak and he realizes that his mother’s teachings held merit once again. There is no interrupting on his end as she begins to describe her parents and he listens, rather fascinated, at the descriptions of them she gives. Speaking of Oceane only reminds him, with a pang of longing and grief, of his own mother. Speaking of Ledger brings flashes of images of a golden stallion who looks much like himself and there is a bright streak of green envy that curls around his inflamed heart. It stays, intensifies even, when she begins to speak of her brother.

What would it have been like if his birth mother hadn’t spurned him? Could he have had that same nuclear family that Lillibet had? What would it be like to have a sibling that you could share everything with? There had been a hope, back in the golden days of living amongst the unruly wildflowers, when Sickle had been brought to live with them that maybe she would end up being his new sister. Part of him had hoped that Aela had brought her for him, had somehow seen that secret desire nestled so far inside of him that he had never voiced aloud. It wasn’t that Aela wasn’t enough, she was. She was the best mother he could ever hope for, ever want. Still, he had started life in a lonely way and it followed him… Despite the ghosts that he could summon or the flames that were his constant companions. It still lurked even when he had met Liesma and other friends along the way.

When he had told Sickle in the Ruins that he had wanted her to stay (“I would have kept you” unable to leave his mouth and expose such a vulnerable desire), it hadn’t been a lie.

His pale skull turns to look at her and catches the shine in her golden eyes. It surprises him then, that it hurts him to see her that way. In an instant, he drops the last remaining signs of his flames and then it is just them, the chill, the darkness, and the moonlight that strengthens his golden glow. “Lilybee.” He murmurs as he hesitates for only a second more and then presses his spotted shoulder to her pale one. “We will find them.” He says roughly, his own throat constricted with thick emotion. And while he knows what it might cost him, that it might mean taking an avenue he truly doesn’t want to take, he doesn’t hesitate when his muzzle swings to her neck and nudges her gently. “I promise.”

FYR

Photo by Little Willow Art

@Lillibet