the sweetest sadness in your eyes; contagion

[leliana]

I waited for something and something died
so I waited for nothing and nothing arrived

He seemed kind and part of her was surprised by that fact. Not because she had never encountered it before (she would be appalled if someone thought that—her life had been brought up by the kindest of hands, surrounded by the kindness of her sister, of Magnus, of the numerous Tephra residents), but rather because it had not become the default—not lately. Even Dovev, in all of his painful and soul-wrenching glory, had not been kind to her. His touch had been possessive, branding—a need that had stirred a fire in her belly, a passion in her soul—but it had not been sweet or soothing. It had broken, shattered…

She had always been the one left to heal the remains.

So she is surprised by the kindness in his voice, the softness in his gaze, and she repeats his name with like, her voice of fog wrapping around the syllables. “Contagion,” a name like a disease, like death, but it didn’t match the gentleness in his eyes, the sensitivity to the slopes of his face. She didn’t know who would press such a name, such a fate, upon a young boy, but she decided it was not his burden to carry.

“I do not,” she answered with a quiet, sad smile, her gaze turning toward the trees as they gathered around them, pressing in on all sides. “I actually live in a land called Tephra.” A light laugh. “It’s the one with the giant volcano,” a pause as she brings her light eyes back to him. Her expression dropped a little then, the control slipping to reveal just a hint of the sadness beneath the calm veneer.

“It doesn’t feel like home anymore though—even though I love the people who live there desperately.”

A pause, the confession feeling treacherous on her tongue.

“I’m not sure why I just told you that.”

it's our dearest ally, it's our closest friend
it's our darkest blackout, it's our final end