[private] Out with the golden we sew // Solace

[Kagerus]

kagerus

and in my dreams I've kissed your lips a thousand times

Unlike Solace, I spend much of my time away from Hyaline - this is perhaps why I have not noticed her distance. But unlike her, I do not go to hide. I go as a servant of our kingdom. But to say that I have been the picture of perfection since the first step would be a grievous falsehood - so when she alights next to me smelling of panic and a woodland not native to Hyaline, I forgive her immediately - but the confusion is harder to be rid of.

"Solace, what's - But my name on her trembling lips stops my heart and the question I had dies in my mouth. For a moment I can only stand as she hides in the dark tendrils of my mane as if they hold some healing powers; but then I am folding in around her, curling my neck to hold her firmly to my side. Though my brows creases with worry, I murmur quiet hushes and soothing sounds into her skin, hoping to bring her out of whatever storm she finds herself drowning in.

I'm sorry.

I pull away, but only because she is lifting her beautiful cerulean gaze to meet mine - except that those eyes are swimming with tears, and my heart breaks to see it. Concern is my foremost emotion - no thought of betrayal or hurt even comes to my heart. I reach for her and burr, nuzzling her nose, not knowing what to say and going instead to the instincts that move my equine muscles. But when she speaks her final words and drops the tears from her crying eyes, I can no longer stand in silence - something is wrong - something has changed.

"Solace, what happened? Please baby, are you okay?" I reach for her again, balking at the thought of taking her to somewhere else when something clearly traumatic has happened. Speaking from experience, doing so can create a dependency; dreams are not so different from drugs, I've discovered. But when I catch the way her tears glint on the high planes of her cheek bones, my resolve shatters, and I am stepping parallel to her, hushing her once more.

"Quiet now, just breathe, okay?"

Her breathing slows, and though I couldn't be more awake, I squeeze my eyes firmly shut and hold the mare fiercely to me. My magic comes in stutters, with frequent reawakening wherein I hush her more and tell her to be patient - but the time passes and I master myself, casting that downy weight of sleep upon us both until there is no chance of us returning until I bid us awaken.

My eyes flutter open - equine eyes, long lashed and searching for hers - to a softly illuminated scene. There's short, soft grass under our hooves, the same as I'd seen in Tephra not so long ago. The soft light shudders as I remember exactly why I'd made that journey, and how I'd been on top of the mountain today in the hopes of fulfilling that which I'd asked Warrick's permission for... But I clench my jaw and banish such thoughts, causing the light to return, glowing only gently around our two figures.

Besides the grass, there's only a smell of lavender and sage; soothing scents, meant to calm and restore strength to frayed nerves. Releasing my grasp on Solace, I gently press my nose to her skin, awakening her to the dream I've created. Hoping, praying, that she may breathe more easily here than atop the foggy, reality-sodden mountain of Hyaline.

"Solace," I start, barely whispering; I tilt my head and maneuver it until she meets my gaze. "Whatever it is that happened, you can tell me." My face contorts as I swallow, but I soldier on. "I love you, and there's nothing you could say that could change that."

@[Solace]