Solace
. . .
Kagerus wants explanations, of course she does, but she delays her own needs at Solaces request. Sleep tugs at the edges of her disordered mind, and relief washes over the milk and honey mare. She can feel herself slipping into the sanctuary Kagerus had made for her, and it breaks the momentum of her downward spiral. Blue eyes flutter open to find the tranquil world of herbs and soft light, and Solace finally feels somewhat sound again.
She had held herself together for everyone else, for their comfort and for her pride. But for Kagerus there was nothing but her raw emotions. Kageurs had always brought out the best and the worst of her, she dragged the young queen's carefully guarded heart into the light - or if not the light, at least the open.
Just like the first time Kagerus had pulled her into this dreamscape, Solace doesn't devote much energy to observing their surrounding; she seeks out the familiar nutmeg gaze which she knows is waiting for her. She finds it, of course she does, and she takes a deep breath as she prays that this is not the last time her General will look at her with such feeling in her eyes.
I don't deserve you.
She had never chosen to fall in love with Kagerus (although if Solace knew of all the comfort and joys which the relationship had brought her, she certainly would have) and she tells herself it will not be Kagerus' fault if she falls out of love. As a romantic at heart, Solace still viewed love as a mysterious, volatile force.
She steels herself, taking another deep drag of the sedative-laced air around them.
Solace doesn't ease her way in - no fine language will lessen the force of what she has to say. She has been greedy enough, asking Kagerus to take her to this world and leaving her in the dark. She has made enough of a mess already, there is no going back now.
"I'm pregnant, Kagerus, and I will understand if you are angry." Defeated yet not subdued, she holds the other mares gaze as her stomach flips and the lump in her throat burns. She is aware that, in this place, she is at the dreamer's mercy, but an outrage would be almost a relief after the weeks of holding in her secret. "I made a mistake and I'm not asking you to forgive me. I'm just here to say, I'm sorry."
With these words, her teeth grind together as she swallows any explanations which would only poision her apology.
@[Kagerus]