Nadya did not sleep that first night.
At first she just assumed that it was the shock and awe of it all that was keeping her awake. The first night on the mountain she spent wordlessly watching the fires eat away at everything she knew, washing away everything in a sea of heat and flame and ash. Nadya watched as the light began to trickle across the horizon, illuminating the true breadth of the destruction. It caused the air to leave her lungs in one loud woosh. She staggered, falling to her knees from the overwhelming exhaustion and grief that consumed her. What have you done? What have you done? The thoughts echoed in her mind, compounding the grief even further.
She eventually gave into the exhaustion and laid down in the very spot she had spent the night gaping at the scene below. She spent the day watching as the fires continued to burn. Nadya did not want to admit it, but she was truly watching to see if any signs of life still existed in Beqanna. She was alone on this mountainside, but was she truly alone in the this world? Had she truly brought destruction upon everyone? Was she doomed to watch all that remained burn away into nothing while she sat tucked away on a mountainside?
Shock kept Nadya awake that first night. Guilt kept her awake the second. She was held hostage by her own thoughts which refused to relent in their own attack against her weakening resolve. She spent that second day much like the first. Watching. Waiting. Thinking.
The third night passed. Sleep did not come.
Exhaustion, both mental and physical, had relegated the grey blue mare to nothing but a blemish on the side of the mountain. Nadya assumed she was alone up here on the mountainside. She thought this was her doing, so she was doomed to be the one witness to the end of all things until it was her time to join all of those she had unknowingly sentenced to death. This was her fate. Her reckoning. She had little desire to do anything to change it now. It was finally when night fell the third night that Nadya finally succumbed to the mental and physical exhaustion and fell into a dreamless sleep.
That was until she heard something.
Not just something, someone.
She craned her neck around and caught movement out of the corner of her eye. Nadya did not think she had hallucinated the voices, but considering she'd slept only a few hours since the disaster she had very little trust in her own senses.
It was pre-dawn, and the lighting was low, but she could clearly pick out not one but two distinct shapes in the darkness. The idea of other survivors was both terrifying and beyond encouraging to Nadya; she couldn't help herself from calling out. She was so tired, she couldn't even drag herself to her feet, but the others had heard her.
Nadya couldn't contain her surprise when a little chestnut filly came bounding through the underbrush, quickly followed by a small grey mare. The filly had a white face set with wide blue eyes - eyes that held the demons of the last four days within them. Nadya couldn't help but wonder if she was the one responsible for the ghosts in the girls blue eyes. The thought sent a wave of pain through the blue mare.
"Mama, I think it's hurt. And look…she's blue," the little girl said to her mother in what she thought was a whisper.
"That's enough, Hilde. You wait here. I'll see if she needs help. You can't go running off like that," the gray mare scolded her daughter. Then the little gray approached Nadya.
"Hello. I'm Cecila and this is my daughter, Hilde. Are you injured?" The mares voice was kind and held far more warmth than the situation called for. Didn't she know this was the end of everything?
Nadya said nothing, but shook her head no.
The gray continued. "There's a group of survivors gathered not far from here - about a dozen of us. You should come with us. There's safety in numbers, you know?" she offered, with a smile.
Hilde decided she had waited long enough and that the strange was no threat. "Yeah, you should come with. It doesn't look like as much fun here, anyway. Come on, we can help you up. Up up up!" The child giggled, and Nadya felt her soft baby-nose against her flank.
"How did you get so blue? Can I be blue? I got sort of purple once when I napped in a blueberry bush. Hey, have you seen any blueberries here? I love blueberries…" Hilde rambled on until she caught her mother's disapproving gaze and then flashed the pair of mares a sheepish glance in apology.
In the end it was Hilde's gentle touch, not Cecila's comforting words, that convinced Nadya to follow the pair. She pulled herself to her feet and took a few steps forward, testing her footing. Pain lanced up her right foreleg and Nadya sucked in a breath. Her eyes flicked downwards to find the source and she found and angry burn wrapped around her foreleg. The hair was blackened where it wasn't burned away entirely, but it was missing from midway up her cannon bone to just below her knee. It was good that the joint itself seemed to have escaped damage, but the wound itself was filled with dirt and debris and had turned black over the past few days.
Cecila, wondering what was causing the hold up, turned back to find Nadya examining her foreleg. "Oh," she murmured, with a frown. "Im sure I can find something to put on that. I'm pretty good with plants and herbs. In the very least I can give you something for the pain."
"Mama is very good with booboos," Hilde affirmed, proudly.
"The others are this way. Don't worry. We'll go slowly," the kind grey mare offered, and turned to continue on their way.
Nadya couldn't help but wonder how long the grey mare's kindness would last if she knew Nadya may have been the catalyst behind all of this destruction.
---
Altogether, there were thirteen survivors. Nadya, of course, stood out with her unnatural coloring. It seemed she was the only of Beqanna's oddly colored population to make it up the side of the mountain. The remainder of this new band were all the colors you would expect to find - shades of bay, brown, chestnut, gray, and a few paints to round out the herd.
"We need to find water," a bay stallion muttered. He was perhaps the largest of the group, and it was obvious that he was keen to take charge. "Ten of you split up into groups of two, two will stay with me," the stallion continued. "There's snow on the top of the mountain, so hopefully there's runoff somewhere that's either flowing down the mountain or has pooled. We just have to find it."
He seemed comfortable with giving orders and no one seemed to have the energy to argue with him. It was clear that many of the survivors knew this stallion. Nadya caught his name via the murmurs that rippled through the little group. Carter. The others were mingling and splitting up directions when Nadya felt a nudge on her shoulder. She turned to find a lanky black stallion, perhaps a few years younger than herself standing patiently at her side. "Hey there," he drawled - his voice somewhat accented, "I'm Orleans. You game to go look for water with me?" His big brown eyes were honest, and though she could see the shadows of the destruction in them, he seemed to radiate a sense of natural comfort.
"Um," she started, hesitantly, "Sure. You lead, I'll follow? I'm Nadya, by the way," Nadya did her best to offer him some semblance of a smile. He countered her attempt with a large grin and beckoned her to follow with a flick of his head. Orleans seemed to recognize the fact that Nadya wasn't much for talking, and they traveled in comfortable silence for a time. It was only when the pain from the burn on Nadya's leg made it difficult for her to keep pace with the lanky Orleans did the black stallion speak again.
"That burn looks like it's gotten infected over the past few days. First thing we should do when we find water is try to get it as clean as we can," there was concern in his voice, but not pity. Nadya appreciated that fact.
Nadya nodded, looking down at the ugly, weeping burn on her leg. She knew that she deserved so much more than just a potentially infected burn on her leg. Orleans decided not to push the blue mare, and instead did his best to match a pace that Nadya set. She wasn't able to engage in much in the way of small talk, everything was just too raw. It didn't seem to bother her companion all that much.
They walked for a few hours when a peculiar scent caught Nadya's attention. She immediately turned to Orleans. "Do you smell that?" she asked, her tone revealing her distaste for the scent. "Yeah, we should check it out," he answered, and was already moving in the direction of the scent before she could answer.
With every step the odor grew stronger. Nadya became weary when a thin veil of fog became visible in front of them, hanging eerily in the clear mountain air. The pair slowed, uncertain of what was hiding behind the fog. They made their way forward cautiously, and were surprised to find that the when the fog touched their skin it wasn't cool - it was warm.
"It's not fog. It's steam," Nadya murmured as the true breadth of their discovery came into view. It was a sulfur fueled hot spring nestled into the side of the mountain. The sulfur explained the smell and there was clear fresh water everywhere just bubbling up out of the earth.
Orleans grinned and looked back at Nadya. "Well it's not the healing waterfalls, but a warm bath has to be the next best thing for that leg!"
---
The pair returned to the meeting place that evening with news of water and the herd relocated closer to the sulfur springs shortly thereafter. Nadya was pleased to find a different sensation flowing through her upon leading the group back to the place she and Orleans had discovered; satisfaction. In the midst of all the death and destruction - she had been able to offer this small group something to make life a little easier, even if just for the day. A little of the weight lifted from her shoulders with this revalation, but the burden she carried was still so close to breaking her.
The next morning, when she awoke, she was surprised to find a little pile of what looked to be tree bark neatly placed before her. The next surprise was Hilde. The girl came bounding out of the trees wearing a wide smile. "Look! Mama found tree bark for your leg! You eat it!" She bounded to a halt and cocked her head.
It was obvious that Nadya did not react quickly enough for Hilde's taste, so the girl continued.
"I said you eat it. Come on, give it a try!" The girl said, gesturing wildly to the little pile of bark. Nadya, unwilling to disappoint the girl, took a few pieces into her mouth and chewed. The bitter taste was surprising, but not particularly unpleasant. She chewed and swallowed before looking back to Hilde. "Happy?" she asked, with a silly smile. Hilde just nodded, and bounced away, looking for someone else to bother.
It was then that Cecila made her way through the trees, and the grey mare seemed pleased that Nadya had found her gift. "You found the bark! Good. Unfortunately it won't do much for infection, but it will help with the pain. The best thing to do for infection is to keep it as clean as possible - and the springs will be best for that. Quite a discovery you and our tall, dark, and handsome friend made yesterday," Cecila offered, with a conspiratorial wink.
Nadya, for the first time since the disaster, laughed.
---
Life continued to fall into a new routine for the mountain band of thirteen. Carter had fully stepped into his role as de-facto leader. Nadya, Cecila, and Orleans had taken to calling him King of the Mountain when they were out on scouting trips. They were careful not to use the nickname around Hilde, who seemed to lack a filter of any sort. The last thing they needed was to be cast out of the little band of survivors with a child, an injured mare, a concerned mother, and a lanky stallion with a questionable sense of humor. They'd survive, but it would be difficult. So they did their best to keep their heads down and their mouths shut. Cater was not unbearable, he was just cocky. However the big bay stallion's intentions seemed to be in the right place - he was bound and determined to keep everyone in the group alive, even if it was clear that they weren't among his favorites.
Over time, Nadya found it easier to open up to her new companions. Orleans seemed to have no qualms with revealing his life story. By the end of the first week, Nadya felt like she knew everything about the lanky black stallion: his parents, his birthplace, the names of all three of his siblings, and all of his his hopes and dreams. It was clear that this disaster had not broken Orleans' spirit, and for that Nadya envied him. Cecila was nearly as forthcoming with the details of her own life, but it was evident that she carried hurt closer to her own heart. She described a simple life with a close family and a mate she had known since childhood - Hilde's father. She didn't have to elaborate on his fate, the answer was in the little grey mare's eyes. The fire had claimed him.
It took two weeks before Nadya felt comfortable sharing more than vague details about her life. Between foraging trips and long hours by the springs she began to open the door to these two individuals who had come to mean something to her. She told them of her family. She told them who her parents were and all of the horrible things they had done. She told them of the siblings she had never met but longed to. She told them about how she had nothing to lose in the fire, not really. She had always been alone.
It was the simple words of a child that filled the void in her heart.
"You're not alone! You have us now!" Hilde said, as if the fact was the most obvious thing in the world and Nadya was foolish for not having realized it sooner.
The blue mare smiled in return.
Yet she did not tell them about her dreamworld.
---
Her heart grew lighter as days continued to slip by. Nadya was pleased that opening up to her friends - for they truly were friends now, not just companions - had not effected their treatment of her. Quite the opposite, really. They had all grown closer. Laughter was easier now. Orleans and Hilde were engaged in a much dramatized game of tag while Cecila collected a few off-white flowers from the base of a solitary pine - Nadya simply watched, treasuring this gift she had been given. It was a second chance, perhaps, to build a life. A life that meant something at the end of the day - independent from the legacy her family name bound her to.
How strange in the face of all this destruction, Nadya had never felt more free.
Her leg seemed no better, but no worse. It seemed that the warm water is helped keep away the worst of the infection, along with Cecila's various plants, but the wound wasn't healing well. The leg remained swollen from the knee down, and Nadya certainly wasn't moving at a normal pace. The joint was functional, however, and the blue mare wasn't in any immediate danger. She could walk and run, if need be, but she knew she was lucky to have friends looking out for her. This wasn't an opportune time for weakness, to say the least.
It was then that the bushes just concealed by a pair of saplings caught her eye. A grin made its way across Nadya's lips and she called Hilde away from her game of tag to show her what she had found.
Blueberries.
---
Things on the mountain had become routine. But the destruction was unwilling to be forgotten. This was the end, was it not? The apocalypse would rise again and rise it did, quite literally.
It started as another normal day on the mountain. Cecila, Hilde, and Nadya were dispatched to find more edible plants and healing herbs that Cecila seemed to have so much knowledge about. Orleans, unfortunately enough for him, had pulled guard duty and was stuck close to the springs for the day. The trio elected to explore a part of the mountain they hadn't been to in some time - the place were the mother and daughter pair had first stumbled across Nadya. Nadya was unsteady on her burned foreleg, but was able to keep up well enough. They spent a few hours looking for any plant that may potentially have medicinal use, but weren't having much luck.
The wind had picked up, blowing from the south, and Nadya hoped that the weather would hold. The wind brought with it more concerning omens than the weather. It was little Hilde that noticed the smell first. She complained to her mother that there must be something dead nearby and wanted to return home so as not to stumble on more death. It made Nadya's heart break a little each time Hilde referenced something terrible she had seen in her short life. The child had truly lost all that was left of her innocence in watching her homeland burned and ravaged. As the trio turned to return to the herd, something caught Nadya's attention. A strange sound coupled with movement down in the ruined lands below. She made her way to a clearing where her view would be unimpeded and what she saw was almost beyond comprehension.
It was an army of something and they were destroying all that remained in the burned-out lands below. Nadya knew in her very bones that these creatures would bring more destruction and would try to tear apart every shred of reality that was left. It seemed like the creatures were locked on to where they were standing and would move heaven and earth to get to them. The monsters were drawn to them like a magnet. Nadya understood. They were being hunted.
With wide eyes Nadya turned back to Cecila. Hilde was hiding behind her mother's flank, shaking. Cecila seemed frozen in shock. Nadya knew what she had to do. "Run. Take Hilde and run. Go to the sulfur springs, take as many as you can along the way - Orleans, if you can find him, but don't take too much time. The sulfur will mask your scent." Of course Nadya didn't know this for sure, but she hoped. Oh, she hoped. Her voice then turned more frantic. "Go now. Don't turn around. Don't look back no matter what you hear. Just go. GO."
Nadya knew with the state that her leg was in, she would only slow the two of them down. She didn't want to lead these…monsters back to the others - even to Carter the asshole King. She had an opportunity to try to keep them safe. She owed it to each and every one of them to try. For a moment, her thoughts flickered to Orleans - the stallion who had become the closest friend she'd ever had in such a short time. She hoped that Cecila would find him on her way - that he'd be safe. She wanted him to live, but she found herself wishing she could see him one last time. Before she had nothing to lose, now she had so much more. She watched as Cecila and Hilde disappeared through the trees, fleeing in the direction of the hot springs.
Nadya took a deep breath and prepared herself for what was next. She took a wobbly step, and then another. She then ground her teeth together and took off in an uneven, clumsy gait in the opposite direction - towards the oncoming hoard.
Their putrid scent burned her nostrils, but she didn't care. She screamed out a battle cry - one comprised of equal parts anguish for the situation and physical pain that was tearing through her leg - and moved to face her destiny head on. The hoard grew closer and she drew herself to a halt before them, only this time in the face of her destiny she didn't close her eyes and wait for the end. She could not help but realize just how much this scene before her echoed her dream-death…the one that had started all of this. Maybe she was fated to meet her end this way.
She met her destiny with her eyes open and her head held high.
At least this time around, her death would be worth something.
N A D Y A
|
