i'm always in this twilight, varick

[Sabbath]

Sometimes her heart feels like a wildfire she lit the match to and never managed to control the flames. The smoke burns her lungs and she’d like to extinguish all that anger built up around her sternum, but she can only let it consume her now. Maybe in another life, she never learned what it is to be engulfed, and in that life, she learns to pronounce the word love without making it into a knife. She could tell Varick she cares for him as easily as she tells her children and still be able to breathe after. Sabbath has dreamt of this life, before, but the memory is gone by the time the haze of sleep lifts from her eyes.

She watches Katarine crane her neck to accept her father’s affection before wiggling closer to Riptide and settling in. There is still hope for their daughter to be gentle and fragile in all the ways Sabbath would like to be. The ways she used to be.

Her wild green eyes watch Varick for a while as she thinks. It isn’t hard to see she’s lost in her thoughts as she stares him down, as though calculating how to break him down into bite-sized pieces again. Can he hear the rampant thump of her pulse thundering in her veins? She leans her head to his and presses a light kiss to his temple before she loses her nerve.

And then, before he can speak or reciprocate, she curls around their newborns and closes her eyes to sleep.

may my enemies live long                                  so they can see me prosper.

sabbath

@[Varick]