05-16-2021, 01:37 PM
He accepted her unnecessary apology without words. Yanhua had wanted to take his anger out on Leilan when he’d gotten the news about Lilliana’s passing, as disappointed and frustrated as he’d been to realize that tragedy and war were about the only things that brought him and the Freyr together, but he’d resisted. Now that time had passed, Yanhua had been able to confront the reality of his dam’s loss while doing his best to move on from her absence. An impossible thing, though necessary for the sake of others.
Amarine might’ve been one of the only few horses whose condolences actually mattered.
He pulled her closer, eyes shut tight against the truth, and then released his grip when her personal story began. The girls had followed her out of Taiga, no doubt about it. Yan knew how stubborn and apt to adventure both Memorie and Cheri were. That part surprised him very little. What did shock him was the idea that Memorie and Cheri would be so willing to throw themselves into danger without a thought - and he remembers seeing them as ghosts for the first time since returning home - fully understanding now just what they’d been through.
But Amarine wasn’t finished. She told him about choosing to stick to the cliffs, that place that felt most like home to her, and Yanhua could feel his heart ache for her and her loss. She’d given everything up to be here with him in Taiga and though he’d been aware of that, he’d somehow hoped that over the years she might’ve found a deeper comfort in these woods than the loneliness she’d been left to carry when Neverwhere had disappeared as well. He doesn’t blame her though; how could he? They’d been friends before lovers, before becoming parents. Yanhua took that into account any time he felt like he’d fallen short of being a good spouse to Amarine.
“I’m so sorry Amarine, so sorry.” He parroted back to her, careful with the horns on top of his head as he lifted his face to press his cheek into the side of her own. Sorry that she’d gone through something horrible. Sorry that he hadn’t been there for her, or for their daughters. For a moment he lets the silent tranquility of the afternoon seep into their reality. He just stands and does nothing but stroke her cheek.
“It’s over now.” He whispered to her and her companion after a while. “Let's go home.”
Wherever that home might be.
YANHUA
@[Amarine]