05-27-2021, 10:04 AM
Mazikeen
The smile that his response inspires is bright and unrestrained. She’d been using his full name, thinking that had been what he preferred after he had used hers. But she likes this change, and hopes that it means things aren’t going to be as formal between them anymore. It does not bother her that he is not blazing with a similar smile, it’s enough that he’s trying - enough that he’s up for spending time with her. She just hopes it is not out of obligation. “Come on then, Sela.” And she sets off towards those shadowy foothills.
Her pace isn’t what it would be normally, and it only takes a few strides for Mazikeen to remember that she’s seen elephants smaller than what she feels like right now. So instead of a thrilling, wild speed she needs to take something a little slower and even then she’s pretty sure she can feel the twins sloshing around.
“I’m going to have twins - like you and Este.” When she says this, she means to say something lighthearted - means to tell him that she hopes her children care for each other the way Selaphiel does for his sister, how they'll look out for each other with such devotion and how she hopes they’re brave and kind like him.
But she does not find it easy to casually talk about being a mother, there are too many darker thoughts mixed in. Because she’s not going to get the chance to know them, because she’s trying to find a way to save Gale and avoid having to kill him and in the process she needs to give up her chance at getting to know these babies at all.
So after a few more steps, instead of something light what she adds is “The… the one I was talking about earlier.” Who she needs to kill, though she does not want to repeat this again. She’s already twisting what she had intended to be a pleasant conversation, already feeling it rotting in her grasp and hating herself for it. She keeps her orange gaze forward, feels the rolling sickness and heartache that comes with these thoughts, when she adds quietly in a voice that does not hide her pain “He’s their father.”
Her pace isn’t what it would be normally, and it only takes a few strides for Mazikeen to remember that she’s seen elephants smaller than what she feels like right now. So instead of a thrilling, wild speed she needs to take something a little slower and even then she’s pretty sure she can feel the twins sloshing around.
“I’m going to have twins - like you and Este.” When she says this, she means to say something lighthearted - means to tell him that she hopes her children care for each other the way Selaphiel does for his sister, how they'll look out for each other with such devotion and how she hopes they’re brave and kind like him.
But she does not find it easy to casually talk about being a mother, there are too many darker thoughts mixed in. Because she’s not going to get the chance to know them, because she’s trying to find a way to save Gale and avoid having to kill him and in the process she needs to give up her chance at getting to know these babies at all.
So after a few more steps, instead of something light what she adds is “The… the one I was talking about earlier.” Who she needs to kill, though she does not want to repeat this again. She’s already twisting what she had intended to be a pleasant conversation, already feeling it rotting in her grasp and hating herself for it. She keeps her orange gaze forward, feels the rolling sickness and heartache that comes with these thoughts, when she adds quietly in a voice that does not hide her pain “He’s their father.”
@[Selaphiel]