and let me crawl inside your veins. I'll build a wall, give you a ball and chain.
For once, it is not her intention to hurt someone.
For once, she wishes there was a way to make this easier, to not have to see the realization dawn across Lepis’ face.
Because she knows that pain, almost. Ophanim has promised her over and over that no one he slept with had ever meant anything to him. He didn’t love them, he didn’t remember them, he didn’t feel anything for them. She never saw him with any of them, though. She couldn’t access his memories or his emotions, either, just whatever thoughts happen to currently be passing through his mind. The idea of him being with someone the way she had just witnessed Wolfbane with Lilliana...that was enough to split her in two.
But only because it was her own hypocrisy doing the cutting, because it was hardly a secret that Starsin had had her share of infidelities.
She knew Wolfbane was making a mistake that he would one day regret, just like she had. And she knew that she was playing an unnecessary role in breaking Lepis – because she can’t just mind her own business – but Starsin still hated that she didn’t know everything that had transpired between Ophanim and his countless flings. And maybe that was for the best, because thinking about it was enough to send her blood simmering. But that didn't mean she was going to keep it from Lepis.
“I’m sorry,” her voice is softer than before, and the intensity in her dark blue eyes has muted. “But it seemed unfair to keep it from you. Because if someone had seen Ophanim with someone else like that…” Her voice trails off, and somewhere in her sleeping husband’s chest her heart constricts in hurt and jealousy – but also guilt from her own affair. “If he loves you, he owes you an explanation,” she says as her sharpened gaze focuses again on hers, and that edge has returned to her voice as she retraces the steps that the Comtesse had subtracted. “Remind him of who you are, Lepis. You’re not some naive little girl that he can just toy with. If he wants to be a hotshot and fuck someone else or fall in love behind your back, then so be it. But he better be brave enough to tell you about it to your face.” She retreats slightly then, the taut lines of her face loosening as she says quietly, “Ophanim and I both had to own our mistakes to each other. That’s the only way we ever moved past them.”
starsin
it’s not like me to be so mean. you’re all I wanted.
( just let me hold you Like a hostage. )
@[Lepis]
