CASIMIRA
dragon-shifting daughter of ashhal and ryatah
She resists the urge to brush off his reassurance, even though she knows Atrox is not the type to compliment someone simply to spare their feelings. But she has placed herself in the shadow of other rulers, such as her mother and Atrox, and Leliana and even Breach,, and she finds it difficult to believe that she could ever measure up. She is setting herself against a seemingly impossible set of standards, and while she knows if her mother were here that she would tell her she would be exactly the kind of queen she was meant to be, it did not keep her from being convinced she’s going to fail.
Would Tephra want her as her queen if they knew just a few short years ago she still had hardly any control over her dragon form?
Would they want her if they knew her recklessness had gotten herself killed, even if it was in an attempt to protect the volcanic kingdom?
She is afraid of failing the memory of her mother, of making Savior regret letting her rule alongside him, and she is so close to being sucked beneath the tide of her worry when she feels Atrox’s touch against her cheek.
She can’t remember if anyone has ever told her that they are proud of her, and to hear him say it causes her chest to tighten with an emotion she cannot name. Maybe because she had assumed she would never have anyone to look to as a father, and she knows that Atrox likely had never expected to be acting as one to a child that wasn’t even his. They were an unlikely pair, brought together be someone who was no longer even here, and maybe that is why she is most surprised—she had half expected the loss of Ryatah to be seen as his way out, and instead here he was, with her, telling her he is proud of her.
“Thank you,” she says, though the two words feel entirely lacking. She can only hope that he will understand the full depth of all she is thanking him for—for being all of the things that he did not need to be, but she is eternally grateful for. She touches her nose to his shoulder, and for just a moment the cold grief she has been carrying with her is overshadowed by warmth.
After a breath of hesitation, she offers cautiously, “Magnus is still there.” She does not know the full story—her mother was always careful to keep many things regarding Atrox private, but Casimira knew enough. She knew Magnus was his son, and one of the few of his own children that he actually cared for. She knew that something had happened that kept Atrox away from him now, and that Casimira had been warned by her mother to not bring up Atrox to Magnus should their paths ever cross. “He keeps to himself, mostly, but he seems like he’s doing well.”
Maybe she had overstepped a boundary with sharing that information with him, but she can’t help to think that no matter what his reaction might be, it would be something he wanted to know—whether he admitted it or not.
@atrox